


Paper Wings

by GUROGAN



Category: Dir en grey
Genre: Alternate Universe - Middle School, First Love, Growing Up Together, Homophobic Language, M/M, My First Fanfic, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-30
Updated: 2018-03-25
Packaged: 2018-10-25 16:37:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 31,136
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10768233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GUROGAN/pseuds/GUROGAN
Summary: Shinya moves to a new middle school in Kyoto from Hirakata with his father, there he meets his new friends Toshimasa and Daisuke. As they are getting to know each other, his new friends warn him about the school's 'Yokai'; a bad mannered 'delinquent' named Kyo who causes misfortune where ever he goes. However, when Shinya first encounters the 'yokai' he feels something odd blooming in his chest.Formerly Acropolis Hill*





	1. The Big Empty House

**Author's Note:**

> Ahh;; 
> 
> This is my first story and I'm really nervous to be posting it. This story will be in the style of snippets and not long chapters as I tend to lose motivations with those. I should also note that Kaoru won't be coming into the story until way waaaaay later like until they are adults, so if you're here for him be prepared to wait a while. The same must be said about the Toshiya x Die pairing unfortunately.
> 
> Also, if there are any misspellings or grammar mistakes please tell me, I'm usually writing these at night and sometimes things slip through ^.^

The ride into the city was quiet and bumpy, the only noise accompanying Shinya and his father was the subtle hum of radio static as the car radio had given out on the ride from his hometown to Kyoto, where he would be living with his father. Shinya adjusted himself on the back seat so he was laying down more comfortably without the fear of falling off due to the potholes littered on the road before them.

"I think you're going to love the house," his father said abruptly, peering at him through the rearview mirror. Shinya tossed his head to the side, feeling rather ambivalent to the whole idea. His last school had been hell and he was grateful to escape it, yet who was to say the same wouldn't happen at this new one?

"It's big, considering we got it at a such a low price. Maybe some foundation problems and the pipes burst, but the pipe situation is already fixed, thank God." It seemed that he was speaking just for conversation's sake, as Shinya neither replied nor made any indication that he had heard anything at all. Nevertheless, he carried on.

"The school is close too, so you we won't have to waste money on the bus." His father seemed rather pleased by this, as after speaking he began to hum a giddy tune that Shinya could not place. He sighed in boredom, wondering when they would finally arrive.

After what felt like hours and hours (which in reality, was only two due to traffic) on the road being bumped around like a rag doll, the rundown car finally came to a stop in front of a traditional looking home beside other identical ones. The only difference was that it was slightly bigger than it's counterparts and not only had peeling paint and splintering wood on the gate, but there was a side yard littered with dead plants and a medium sized tree that seemed to be struggling to keep itself alive.

"We're home!" His father said cheerfully, as if they had just pulled up to their old tiny apartment in Hirakata. Shinya slowly sat up and stretched his aching joints before exiting the car with his backpack. He wrinkled his nose slightly at the old house, just imagining all the spiders that have probably taken up residence in the place made him shudder is barely concealed disgust. Nevertheless, he followed his father to the trunk of the car and helped him get the boxes of stuff they had packed. There was very little, seeing as the apartment was tiny and didn't have room for much of anything besides the essentials.

"Grab what you can and put it in the hallway," his father instructed with a happy chirp and began taking hastily labeled boxes past the rotting gate and into the house. Shinya clicked his tongue in annoyance and began taking the boxes into his arms, making sure that he was careful just in case.

It took the father and son duo only one more trip to get all of the boxes from the trunk and even smaller ones from the passenger seat and the backseat where they were situated on the floor. The rest of the stuff was to be arriving a couple of days later in a moving truck, leaving them to use the dusty blankets and futons left by the previous tenants.

"Alright, I'm going to check in with the office at work and when I come back we can get dinner." The older man said whilst dusting his hands off on his jeans, Shinya nodded almost sullenly. The idea of being left to his own devices in an old house with nothing in it nor any electricity didn't really go over well with him, but he figured it wouldn't hurt to start unpacking. Also, he was sick of the car his father had insisted on keeping despite of many offers to upgrade.

"Okay," His father smiled and left Shinya to the empty house, the gate creaking in protest and hitting the post beside it signaling that his father had left the property. The puttering of the vehicle punctuating the temporary finality.   
It was unnerving, Shinya gulped, to be alone in this ancient silence. He shook his head with a scowl, the house wasn't that old. It had been rebuilt and renovated into a slightly more modern home after the war and inhabited by families until a little under a decade ago when it had been foreclosed. Still, he shivered as he pushed the box labeled 'kitchen' into the proper room and began unboxing the cutlery and dishes. Being alone in such a new place terrified him more than the fifteen year old cared to admit, so he resolved to stay close to the grimy windows letting in grey sunshine and the door that would most likely need a new lock in the coming months.

Finally, after unboxing random items for the kitchen and living area, Shinya moved on to the upper level of the house with his own personal box. He picked the second biggest room, as the bigger one was reserved for his father and the smaller was to be turned into a type of office. He opened the dusty window and took note that the dead garden was right below, the lone tree had twisted it's branches closely to the sill. So much so that Shinya quietly resolved to talk to his father about clipping that particular branch so that it didn't tap or scrape at the already fragile glass when it was moderately windy. Also, the last thing he wanted was to be frightened awake by incessant tapping at the window.

Returning back to the box, he unpacked his little figurines that had been gifted to him despite not really knowing where they were from. He placed them on the floor against the wall for the time being and began putting the rest of the contents of the box into the closet, as there was nothing to unpack until the moving truck came. Instead he pulled out the futon and slapped the dirt off of it until he deemed it worthy of being laid on.

He sprawled himself on top of it, bored and unfeeling. Mindlessly staring at the ceiling, counting the cobwebs draped from the rafters above, Shinya then closed his eyes tiredly. Sleep enveloped him rather quickly as the day had tired him out from last minute packing in Hirakata to the drive and then unpacking the kitchen.

It wasn't until a little past sundown that he had awoken to the gate opening and closing loudly, smacking itself against the latch with a thump. Shinya rubbed the sleep from his eyes and wondered if there was any point to going downstairs in the dark.

"Shinya!" He groaned and sat up, knowing from the heavy steps on the stairs that his father was coming up, hopefully with a flashlight.   
The door opened, revealing the teen's father. He possessed a worn yet slightly youthful face that indicated to others that he was in his mid to late thirties, the white candle he was holding made him look years older, illuminating every crease and wrinkle with flickering light.   
"I brought dinner," he said tiredly, gesturing for his son to follow him. Shinya got up and followed his father's imposing figure down the stairs and to the kitchen where a fast food bag was sitting on the counter.   
The father and son duo ate in exhausted silence until Shinya's father piped up with a strained voice.

"I'm going back to the office tomorrow for most of the day, so if the utilities don't come on past noon call my office and ask for me. I'll be able to call them from my office and get all that stuff fixed." He said and dug into his pocket and brought out his cell.

"I'll leave it for you on the counter in the morning, luckily I was able to charge it at work so don't be on it all day." Shinya nodded dutifully, feeling somewhat giddy at the fact that tomorrow he would be free to explore around the house and the immediate area.

"I'll also leave some money just in case you want to get lunch for yourself somewhere, just be careful and don't go too far." He warned, he just received another nod from his son and left it at that.   
After finishing their meal, Shinya's father handed over another long white candle and a lighter to his son and told him not to burn the house down with it then bade goodnight. Moving rather sluggishly to the biggest bedroom situated on the ground floor, which according to his father, had been a formal living room with the purpose of entertaining guest.  
  
Yawning, Shinya lit the candle and made his way up the stairs and to his room, making sure to blow it out and envelope the room in utter darkness, save for the curtain-less window. 


	2. Red Flash

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shinya meets a new friend in a haphazard way.

Shinya awoke with a sneeze and a wince as a ray of sun blinded his blinking eyes. He sat up blearily, rubbing at his eyelid with his palm of his slim hand.  
Stretching until his aching bones cracked, Shinya briefly wondered what he would do that day. Getting something for breakfast was at the forefront of his mind as his stomach began to rumble.

It took him no time at all to dress himself in a T-shirt and jeans as it would be pointless to shower seeing as the utilities had yet to come on. He hurried down the stairs and snatched up the dated cell phone and money off the counter, hesitating for a moment in order to check the time.  
  
It was thirty minutes past noon. Frowning, he dialed his father's office number and quickly asked for a 'Mr. Terachi'. In just a couple of seconds he was connecting to his father who seemed rather annoyed at the moment.  
  
"Yes?" He barked into the receiver, Shinya's frown deepened but he replied with a sigh.

"The lights and water still haven't come on," he heard a long suffering exhale of breath from his father and a moment of silence enveloped them.

"I'll call them, just entertain yourself until I get home." A click notified Shinya that he had been disconnected, being unbothered by this, he simply flipped the phone shut and stuffed it into his pocket.

After slipping on his sneakers, Shinya emerged from the house and started walking in no particular direction. He was bound to find a food stall in the bustling yet traditional city.

His assumption was proven correct as he found a stall selling takoyaki. His stomach growled more ferociously at the smell of cooked batter and he eagerly ordered enough to keep him full for the rest of the afternoon, making sure to save enough money for an ice cream if his father returned home late.

After ordering, the teen happily snacked on his takoyaki whilst looking for a place to sit and properly enjoy his food. Yet, after walking for a bit and not finding anywhere suitable, he decided to walk back towards the stall which had wooden tables and chairs that looked splintery and uncomfortable.

"Better than standing," he mumbled to himself, but somewhat doubted that as the rundown eating area came into view.

Shinya never got the chance to sit down, however, as a flash of red made him tumble onto the ground and drop the rest of his takoyaki onto the ground with him.

"Aw man!" The taller teen standing above him groaned, before Shinya could even muster up the energy to stand and glare, the teen grabbed his thin hand and began yanking him away with surprising strength for someone so thin.

"Over here!" The teen laughed while hurriedly pulling Shinya down the road. Shinya, ever the shy boy, let himself be pulled and even matched the other boy's pace by running with him. The other boy finally pulled Shinya behind a building and slapped his hand over the taller's mouth in an effort to hush him, he peered behind a corner anxiously and after hearing the fading yells of an adult man he removed his hand.

Up close Shinya could see that the flash of red was in fact the teen's flaming hair, it looked strange on him, as if he was supposed to be older.

"Sorry about that," he apologized sheepishly, but his lips held a roguish smile.

"You made me drop my food," was all Shinya could think of saying. That statement was neither accusatory or angry, rather non-chalant, as if he was a bystander who had simply observed the incident.

"Oh yeah, uh..." The teen grew silent as he dug into his pocket and handed the taller teen a handful of wrapped candies.

"You know, I've never seen you before?" Shinya shook his head.  
"I just moved here yesterday." He replied and unwrapped a candy before popping it into his mouth.

"Seriously? How old are you?" The taller teen took a moment before replying.  
"I'm 15, what about you?" The other teen grinned widely.

"Same here, looks like we'll be going to the same school this semester." He unwrapped one of his own candies and pressed it into his mouth.

"What's your name, by the way? My name is Daisuke, but you can call me Die." He extended his hand, Shinya shook it, a little surprised at this.

"I'm Shinya, and I've been meaning to ask you what's with your hair color?" It was a little straightforward, but Shiny was always curious when it came to things like that.

"Oh this?" Die gestured to his shocking red hair, he shrugged with a grin.  
"Don't believe it's real huh?" Shinya shook his head with a laugh.

"Nah, it's just that I really like red and my friend Toshimasa agreed to dye it for me before he left to Nagano this break. Gotta dye it back before next week for school though." He explained cheerfully, his smile fell a bit when he mentioned school but it was back before long.

"Oh, I see. Sorry about your friend." Shinya looked down and crumpled the wrapper in his hand.

"Oh no, he's just visiting family there. You'll get to meet him when term starts next week! He kinda looks like you, but he has darker hair. Might be a bit taller, but it's been a while since I saw him last month." Die shrugged, but Shinya could see just from the way he talked about Toshimasa that he missed him.

"Candy won't be enough huh?" Die looked pointedly at the candy still in Shinya's hands. Shinya shook his head furiously and put the candy in his pockets.

"It's fine! I was almost finished with my food anyway so no worries." It was Die's turn to shake his head.

"Nope! My mom made extra skewers at home and it's not far from here. I'll feed ya and then send ya home." He laughed but latched onto the thinner teen's wrist and began to pull him in the direction of his own home.

"Woah, do you even eat? You're probably thinner than Toshimasa, he's a black hole but still looks like a light post." He tsked and turned onto another road, Shinya made sure to remember the route, as he didn't want to get lost.

It wasn't long before Die stopped in front a home that looked way more modern than Shinya's. Instead of a rotting gate, it was a black one composed of metal bars with 'ANDOU' engraved into a metal plate right beside it.

"I'll be right back!" Die didn't even bother to open the gate, but rather elected to jump over it using his arm. It took him a couple of minutes, but he came out with six skewers holding grilled chicken. He walked up the fence and handed Shinya three, then opened the metal barrier with his free hand and began walking down the street back to where he and the taller teen had their conversation.

"Do you know how to get back to your house from here?" Die asked while taking a bite out of the delicious chicken.

"Not really," Shinya felt his face burn pink, he tried to cover it up by taking a bite out of his own skewer. The taste nearly made him groan, as it reminded him of his own mother's cooking.

"What's the address?" Die questioned, stopping for a brief moment in order to discard the stick he had cleaned of chicken with his teeth.

Shinya told him the street, to which Die had dismissed as easy to find and set off towards the direction of his new friend's home, all the while pointing out landmarks and vendors that would help him find his way in the event he ever got lost.

Shinya was extremely grateful for all of this and made a mental note of taking Die out for ice cream, and maybe even Toshimasa too, if they got along well enough.

Finally after ten minutes, Shinya and his friend arrived onto the familiar street and headed towards the run down house.

"Which ones yours?" Die asked, letting his eyes roam around the traditional looking houses.

Shinya balked for a moment, feeling self-conscious as he wondered how his new friend would react to him living in the most run down house.

"I really like that one, always have." A sense of overwhelming relief filled Shinya like a balloon as he followed Die's finger with his eyes. He was pointing towards the taller boy's house with the same cheerful grin.  
  
"That's where I live," he answered shyly, Die turned to him with good natured surprise.

"Seriously!? I've always wanted to live in a traditional house like that!" Shinya blushed and laughed it off, but he was secretly very pleased.

"Ah, it's getting late. I'll see ya later Shinya-kun!" Shinya nodded and waved goodbye to Die.

"See you at school Daisuke-kun." The taller teen said with a happy smile, he walked into his house when Daisuke was no longer in view. As he flicked on the light switch, he was struck with the feeling of acceptance as he was bathed in light.

"Maybe this place won't be too bad." He conceded with a small smile. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to post two chapters as the first one, I think, is kinda inadequate and two chapters would be better to establish the story. The next chapter should be added next week, hopefully on Friday or Saturday ^.^


	3. Junior High on a Hill

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shinya's first day at his new school, where he meets another good friend.

Shinya adjusted his gakuran in the mirror, his room now being furnished with a dresser, desk, mirror and a bed. He bit his full lips nervously while fiddling with the buttons of the black uniform, making sure that everything was in place as just moments before he had to re-button his white button up underneath as he had done them up out of order.   
  
"Shinya! Are you ready yet?!" He heard his father's exasperated calls, he swallowed again and nodded to himself in the mirror. He opened his door and hurried down the steps once more to see his father waiting for him with his lunch money.

"Excited for your first day of school?" Shinya nodded and took the offered money.

"I know I don't have to tell you this again right? Don't....do any of the things that you got you into trouble at your old one alright? I still don't get what you did at the other one, but don't do it here. Got it?" His son withheld his sigh, instead he got a stiff nod in affirmation.

To be truthful, Shinya had done nothing but be himself and his peers had filled in the blanks themselves. Thankfully, the only thing his father knew of the situation back in Hirakata was that Shinya was being mercilessly bullied. Shinya thanked every and any deity that his father was never privy to the reason of his social exile from the rest of the boys.

"Good, now go and make some friends." His father slapped his back and sent him on his way.

Shinya walked anxiously, letting his eyes drift around the road and observed the passing morning delivery trucks and salarymen on their way too work. So casual and unassuming, he wondered if one day that would be him on his way to an unfulfilling job that he would work until his died. He hoped childishly that this was not the fate awaiting him upon graduation of high school.

"Shinya? Shinya!" A familiar voice called out to him from behind, making the taller teen turn around in confusion. He saw Daisuke, his once flaming red hair now a mute shade of black, barreling towards him with another, much taller, boy in tow.

"Remember me?" He looked at the other teen with hopeful eyes while his friend looked on in amusement.

"Daisuke," Shinya wasn't one to remember names that easily, but he couldn't forget the boy who had shown him such kindness on his second day in a new city.

"See! Told you he'd remember me!" He chided his friend and fell into step with Shinya.

"This is the guy I was telling you about, Shinya." Daisuke gestured to the tall teen trailing behind them.

"I'm Hara Toshimasa, but Die just calls me Toshiya." Shinya nodded.

"I'm Terachi Shinya." Toshiya nodded with a smile.

"Yeah, when I got back from Nagano yesterday Die wouldn't shut up about you." The boy with his arm around Shinya's shoulder turned hastily to Toshiya, his cheeks flushed red, not unlike the color that once pigmented his hair.

"Shut it Hara!" He hissed which made the tallest teen out of the three laugh almost maniacally. Shinya smiled at their banter, never really experiencing such bonding in Hirakata as he was the one who was always left out.

"Anyway, we better hurry. Class is starting in like ten minutes." Toshiya groaned and the three boys picked up their pace.

~

Once at the school, all three boys were pleased to see that they were all in the same homeroom class and were even seated in close proximity of each other. Toshimasa and Daisuke sat right in front of Shinya while the seat next to the new student was empty. Not long after the students settled themselves into their seats, their teacher began calling out role.

"Andou, Daisuke?"

"Here!" Daisuke yelled, far louder than needed which earned him a stern glare from the teacher. The teacher could only roll his eyes as Toshimasa did the same when it was his turn, Shinya grinned and briefly wondered if he should do the same. He shook his head and quickly dismissed the idea; no use getting the teacher to hate him on his first day.

"Nishimura, Kyo?" Silence enveloped the room much to Shinya's confusion and all at once fearful whispers erupted from the students. Eyes made their way towards Shinya's direction, seeing as the only empty desk was right next to his where Nishimura Kyo was supposed to be. Shinya cocked an eyebrow to his friends as they, too, had turned to shoot their new friend concerned glances as if he were just diagnosed with fatal and incurable disease.

"Nishimura, Kyo? Absent." The teacher flicked his eyes to the roll and marked absent on Kyo's place, tsking to himself.

"Absent on the first day, what a way to begin." He sighed but continued on.

"Terachi, Shinya?"

"Present." Shinya minutely wondered if it would have been better if he kept his mouth shut, as everyone's eyes minus his two friends drifted over to him once again.

"He looks like a girl," one student whispered loudly to the agreement of other students.

"Looks like a sissy." One boy commented rather rudely.

"Hey Miharu, wanna say that a bit louder. I don't think the kids next door heard ya." Daisuke barked sarcastically, earning a another glare from the teacher but his outburst quickly quieted the class and discouraged them from further teasing.

"Anyway, let's get to the lesson." The teacher quickly tried to take control of his class and started writing on the board.

~

"Man, if Miharu tries to do anything to you just tell me and I'll mess him up." Daisuke muttered hotly, Toshimasa nodded and offered Shinya some of his bento.

"It's okay, I don't think he'll ever bother me after that." Shinya murmured, not looking up from his book.

"Also, stay away from Subaru. He's the class bully and a real ass." Toshimasa said, nodding to a group of obnoxious boys who were laughing riotously by the classroom door.

"Make that Kyo too, which won't be too hard since he never comes to class." This piqued Shinya's interest as he wondering about the boy all class period.

"What about him?" Toshimasa and Daisuke both shared a look.

"He's called the class 'yokai', the rumor is that if you hang around him for a while you'll get bad luck." Daisuke started off.

"Obviously that can't be completely true, but last year his only friend ended up getting sick. Like they couldn't figure out what was up with him so they moved him to Tokyo so he could get better there. The year before, his other friend ended up breaking both legs when they were climbing trees. So you just can't help feeling like there's something up with him." Toshimasa finished, his voice low and face close to Shinya's.

"He's also really good at fighting and he's freaking terrifying when he's angry. Like I would never want to cross Kyo." Die shook his head vigorously, the lighter haired boy gulped at this. Daisuke seemed so unafraid of those around him, but to hear he was wary of Kyo made his skin crawl.

"He must really be bad huh?" He said nervously, looking between his friends and the suddenly sinister appearing desk beside him.

Toshimasa and Daisuke could only offer him weak comforting smiles.

~

"Terachi-kun?" Shinya looked up from packing his school bag, a book still in his pianist like hands.

"Yes teacher?" He asked politely, wearily eyeing the stack of text books in his arms.

"I'm really sorry to burden you with this, Terachi-kun, but no one else has volunteered to take the extra text books back to the book room and you're the only one left." Shinya quickly shut his mouth as he was about to nicely reject the offer.

"Also, you're the only one I really trust." The older man sighed weakly.

"Trust?" Shinya murmured, quite confused by his teacher's wording.

"Ah yes, last year I had Andou-kun and Hara-kun do it and they ended up tossing the books, very expensive ones mind you, into the trash bins." Shinya cringed inwardly.

"Ah I see-"  
"Which they threw off the school roof." Shinya was really at a loss for words at this revelation.

"Okay." The teacher grinned brightly and dumped the arm load of heavy books onto Shinya's desk.

"You don't have to do it now, just sometime tomorrow would be alright. I would recommend the morning as there's no one in the book room at that time." Shinya nodded tiredly and eyed the stack of books with distaste.


	4. The Boy in the Book Room

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shinya finally encounters the school's Yokai.

Shinya huffed in annoyance as he hiked up his bag and readjusted the heavy books in his arms. He knew he should've rejected the offer to take the surplus textbooks from the homeroom classroom back down the book room, however his shyness kept him from saying no as both Toshimasa and Daisuke refused to help him (both boys citing that they were not allowed to handle the books outside of a controlled class environment).

He inwardly cursed his own shyness and tried to hold the books in a way where he could open the door and not drop them. He barely managed to slip into the room without dropping anything, now the next challenge was to find the proper place for the textbooks so that if they were ever needed, they could be easily accessible. He sat them down on an empty table and assessed his surroundings, seeing no other living being besides a teenage boy with his head nose deep into a book with no cover. The boy seemed to not have heard him, or rather elected to ignore his presence in favor of the words printed on the page.

Shinya couldn't blame him though, that's what the book room was for after all.

Diverting his attention from the other boy, he quickly set to work trying to find the correct place and was quickly finding this task to be harder than it should've been.

"They belong over there." A quiet voice piped up, momentarily frightening the taller teen. He looked towards the shorter boy and saw with a shiver that he was who Toshimasa and Daisuke called the 'Yokai'; his green notebook had betrayed his name, 'Nishimura Kyo' had been printed on the front cover with black permanent marker.

"T-Thanks," he coughed out nervously and made his way with the heavy books towards the spot where the 'Yokai' had pointed to. He took his time putting them on the shelf in favor of watching the other boy flip through thick volumes almost mindless, every once in a while he would stop at a page with furrowed brows.

Shinya felt his heart skip a beat, thinking of how different he had pictured the 'Yokai'. He did look like a delinquent on some level; his hair was messy along with his uniform, several buttons being undone and a black T-shirt peeking through, but from Shinya's vantage point he looked rather dutiful and focused. The taller teen let his eyes survey the Yokai's face, trying with all his might to be inconspicuous. His cheeks were round, childlike even, and his lips were slightly on the thin side, not at all like the ugly version he had built up in his head of this so-called demon student.

He wondered if Toshimasa and Daisuke had pointed out the right person to him, for this boy could not be the notorious 'evil' delinquent. Even his voice was intelligent and precocious, definitely not thuggish and rude-sounding like the other boys.

After taking his time with the books, he stood up and checked his watch. Class was going to be starting in just a couple of more minutes, sighing, he casted one more secretive glance to the other boy and turned to leave.

~

"You alright?" Die asked after flicking a bit of his eraser at Shinya's face. The taller teen blinked and looked between Toshimasa and Daisuke's faces, he shrugged with a sheepish smile.

"Sorry, I didn't get much sleep last night." Shinya apologized and picked up his pencil in order to begin writing.

"Same here," he flashed his friend a lecherous grin and was playfully slapped by Toshimasa on the arm.

"Gross, we don't need to hear that!" The taller of the three friends reprimanded Daisuke with an easy grin.

"Hey, do you know how to solve this equation?" Toshimasa gestured to the assignment on their desk. Shinya nodded and handed his own paper over so that both of his friends could copy.

"Yeah, just move the x to the other side," Shinya began but was cut off by the door opening and a sudden hush settled itself across the classroom. All three friends looked towards the front and were surprised to see Kyo walking towards them.

He settled himself into the seat right next to Shinya, promptly ignoring everyone else in the classroom.  
Shinya, eyes wide, looked towards his two friends and was met by their equally as wide eyes. They shook their heads and turned around, effectively leaving him to his doom. Great, Shinya thought hopelessly.

"Have a pencil I can use?" Shinya felt his heart beating out of his chest, but forced his brain into action.

"Yeah," he shakily rooted around in his pencil bag and handed over a newly sharpened writing utensil to Kyo. His breath hitched as their finger's touched for a brief moment that seemed like an eternity to the taller boy.

"Thanks," Kyo nodded and began working on the assignment at hand. Shinya could only nod back shyly with pink cheeks, he turned his attention to the paper on his desk but could barely think of how to solve the problems. His mind was curiously blank, yet so many thoughts were racing in his head. His head was left even more useless than before, he thought miserably.


	5. Inch by Inch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shinya learns a little but about Kyo's preferences.

It had been about two weeks since Kyo's first appearance in class and one week since Shinya had taken to the habit of visiting the book room early in the morning before class. Normally, he would be in class with only a few minutes to spare so this change of pace stuck out to his father the most.

"You've been going to school really early lately, you didn't get in trouble did you?" Shinya shook his head as he slung his bag over his shoulder.

"No, it's just early tutoring." He replied, bending down to slide on his sneakers and tie them.

"Okay, don't get into any trouble." Shinya's father warned and sent him off.

Shinya walked to his junior high with sleepy thoughts, thinking only of how cute Kyo looked the other day napping in the book room. His face nestled between his thin arms and the book his had been reading pushed aside to make room. The taller teen was entranced by the rising and falling of his fragile looking back and the peaceful expression composed of his closed eyes and slightly agape mouth. So innocent and serene, Shinya felt supremely privileged to see such a sight regarding the fearsome teen. 

The taller teen blushed at this memory and tried to shake away the feeling of being slightly creepy. He just couldn't help himself when it came to the shorter teenager, he luckily hadn't been caught glancing at him in class either.

"What are ya doing up so early?" An exhausted voice called out making Shinya jump and turn, relaxing when he saw Daisuke sulking over whilst yawning.

"Just returning some books," Shinya gestured to the bag on his shoulder with a small grin.

"What about you?" Daisuke groaned in annoyance.

"The coach wants me to come in early and help inflate the soccer balls since I skipped practice with Toshiya." He face palmed at his own idiocy.

"What about Toshiya?" Shinya asked, an amused smile playing at his lips.

"He's not on the team, that jerk." Daisuke laughed and swung his arm around his friend's shoulders.

"Looks like it's just you and me for this walk." He leered and began poking the taller teen.

"Ah, stop it!" Shinya laughed while trying to get away from his friend's prodding fingers. He finally broke away and began running towards the school, Daisuke laughed and picked up his pace as well.

It only took them a couple of more minutes of racing each other to get to the school, then much to Die's disappointment they both had to go their own ways; Die to the gym and Shinya to the book room.

Once inside the book room, Shinya settled himself at the table beside Kyo's usual place and opened his book, anxiously awaiting the arrival of the carrier of his affections.

Only ten minutes had elapsed until Kyo made his appearance, his eyes rested on Shinya for just a moment before he began browsing the shelves for more poetry books. Shinya smiled softly to himself and buried his head into the book Kyo had checked out a week before.

~

"What kind of hair style do you like on girls?" Toshimasa had turned around to face Shinya in order to eat his bento on the the lighter haired teen's desk, but through bites of his food he began asking his friends inane questions about their preferences concerning girls. Shinya shrugged, flipping aimlessly through a music magazine Daisuke had lent him for lunch break.

"Short, I guess?" He said, looking up for a moment to see his friend stuffing his face.

"Hm, nice nice. Die?" Die shrugged and looked up from his own lunch.

"Long hair is pretty nice, you can grab onto it." He smirked and received a grossed out look from Toshiya and an amused chuckle from Shinya.

"What about you, Kyo?" Shinya looked up, surprised that Toshiya would even ask the ever quiet student. Nevertheless, he turned to look at the shorter boy expectantly.

"Long, definitely." Kyo replied, looking up from his book for a brief moment. Shinya quirked his lips in annoyance and twirled a piece of his hair between his fingers.

"Sweet, I like long hair too. Take that Shinya," Toshiya stuck his tongue out teasingly. Shinya laughed and pretended to pout at losing the opinion competition.

"I'll be right back," he excused himself to go to the bathroom and once there studied his image in the mirror.

His hair was suddenly too short for his liking, barely reaching past the tops of his ears. He decided to grow his hair out, at least until it reached his shoulders, maybe even a little bit past that. It couldn't hurt to grow it out and he was pretty sure long hair would compliment his already feminine features.

Maybe, he thought to himself, just maybe Kyo would notice.

He grinned happily and resolved to watch his hair grow inch by inch.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to do a double update since both chapter 4 and 5 are both really short T.T
> 
> However, chapter 6 should be up at the beginning of next week as it is kind of long.
> 
> Also, chapter 5 seems kind of nonsensical, but I promise it will have some meaning in later chapters~


	6. Dirt Monster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kyo's problems with his bully, Subaru, finally boil over.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Language Warning*  
> Also some minor violence
> 
> Next chapter will be updated next Saturday or Sunday. I have to disappear for week unfortunately ;-;

Two weeks had past since Shinya had decided to grow his hair out and everyday he checked in the mirror to see if his hair grew. So far, the tips of his brown hair had reached the bottom of his ear lobe and he was quite pleased with the progress. Hopefully by the end of the month he'd be able to tie it back in a ponytail, Shinya happily thought. However, as for now he was content with the length and rate of growth.

"Hurry up Shinya, you'll be late for school!" Shinya preened just a minute more and ran downstairs to put on his shoes and grab his school bag.

"You're hair is getting kinda long, think we'll need to cut it soon?" Shinya shook his head vigorously.

"No!" Shinya's father was caught off guard at his tone, but his son quickly backtracked.

"Sorry, I just really like this length. Maybe later?" Before his father could say anything, his son took off towards school and prayed that his father wouldn't push the issue.

"Sup Shinya!" The teen turned around at the sound of his name and saw both Toshimasa and Daisuke walking towards him.

"Hey guys," he waved and stopped walking so that they could catch up.

"What are you guys doing up so early, have to inflate the soccer balls again?" Die laughed and shook his head.

"Nope, this one," he punctuated the word with a playful hit on Toshimasa's shoulder, "is forcing me to go with him to turn some assignments."

"It's scary to go to the school alone, what if it's haunted and I get dragged into the girl's toilet and drown?" Toshimasa sighed, hugging himself in a joking manner.

"Yeah right, I think the ghost in the girl's bathroom would rather take Shinya than you." Die teased and nodded towards his other friend.

"Don't say that, besides we don't even have a girl's bathroom." Shinya laughed and helped Die push the school gate open.

"You always have to kill my dreams, Shinya." Toshimasa bemoaned as they took off their outside shoes and slipped on their school slippers.

"Anyway, coming with us to the homeroom class?" Die asked, Shinya thought for a moment and agreed. Besides, he still had all day to watch Kyo.

"Sure, let's go."

~

The day up until lunch had been quiet and uneventful, the class had a math test in the morning and another kanji test scheduled for the afternoon portion of class.

The first hint of the brewing incident was how unnaturally quiet Kyo had become after showing up late for the beginning of class. Normally, when the other three boys would try to include him into their conversations he would at least try to keep up. Today, on the other hand, he had replied to their conversation with stony and angry silence.

Shinya couldn't help but squirm, he felt as though if he even breathed too loudly or moved too abruptly Kyo would snap at him.

Things took a dark turn at the end of lunch, as Kyo had gotten up and left the classroom while the three boys began talking about his poor mood.

"Maybe they banned him from the book room?" Die supplied, picking at his bento somewhat nervously. Toshimasa shook his head and plucked a cherry tomato from his friend's lunchbox.

"Doubt it, maybe it was Subaru again?" He murmured lowly between bites of tomato. Shinya cocked his head; he knew of Subaru as he was the class bully, but thankfully never bothered Shinya as he was friend's Daisuke. Toshimasa had assured Shinya that Subaru was terrified of Die after several run ins during the break last year, but still the lighter hair teen avoided the bully like the plague.

"I heard they got into an argument outside the book room this morning," another student who had heard Toshiya, announced to the trio.

"Know what it was about?" Die asked, popping an octopus sausage into his mouth, much to the displeasure of Toshiya as he was eyeing that same sausage.

"You know how they are," the student shrugged and turned back to his own group of friends.

"Man, they really hate each other, don't they?" Toshiya muttered, gratefully accepting a hard boiled egg from Die.

"Yup, can't blame Kyo though. Subaru is a grade A asshole." Both Toshiya and Shinya had to agree at that.

A lull in the conversation was caused by the subject of their hushed talk walking into the classroom with a wicked smirk. He sat himself down in his chair while laughing with his cronies. The classroom fell into uneasy silence as the other students waited with baited breath for Kyo to make his appearance.

They didn't have to wait long, however, as the shorter student walked through the opened classroom door rather nonchalantly. Either uncaring or oblivious of everyone's eyes on him, he walked to his seat with his head down.

Even though his eyes were on the floor, he didn't see the foot snaking out as he passed by Subaru's desk, effectively tripping him. Shinya cringed when he heard the sickening thud of Kyo's face hitting the floor, he looked to Toshiya and Die, the later teen already standing to go to Kyo's aid.

This was unneeded, as Kyo got up and threw himself on top of Subaru.

"You fucking asshole!" Kyo spat out while rolling on the floor, as he and the bully fell onto the ground. Shinya watched in frozen terror as Kyo kicked and punched, snarling like a wild animal that had lost its mind.

"That is enough!" The teacher who had just arrived yelled and pulled the two boys apart. Kyo had a cut lip, but Shinya noted with sick content that Subaru's nose was bloody.

"Little bitch, just wait!" Subaru snarled as the teacher's clenched fist around his uniform tightened.

"Subaru, quiet!" The teacher snapped.

"Come at me again and I'll punch your fucking face in," Kyo growled in boiling contempt. He wasn't straining to get out of the teacher's grasp, but Shinya was wholly convinced that if he tried, the older man had no chance of holding him back.

"At the field after school, you fucking runt!" Subaru yelled as another teacher poked his head in and saw the ruckus.

"Fine," Kyo snarled and let himself by taken by the other teacher to, Shinya presumed, the office where their parents would most likely be called.

Both teachers left the room with both pupils, letting the class erupt into chaos once again.

"What the hell," Die muttered to himself and sent glances to both Toshiya and Shinya.

"I know right, of all times to start a fight..." Toshiya trailed off uncomfortably.

"Subaru had it coming though," Shinya said bitterly, unaffected by the heated glares given to him by Subaru's cronies.

"Wanna say that again sissy?" Die turned to the boy who opened his mouth and sent him his own withering glare.

"Shut the fuck up."

That effectively cowed the boy into silence.

Soon, the teacher came back and order was restored in the classroom. However, despite the outer image of order, the students were buzzing with the thought of seeing the fight between Kyo and Subaru free of adult intervention.

~

"Where are you going?" Shinya stopped as he felt two pairs of hands latching onto the strap of his book bag.

"Home?" He deadpanned, inwardly laughing at the disappointed and pouty faces of his friends.

"You gotta come see the fight, everyone is gonna be talking about it!" Toshiya whined while tugging at his friend's strap.

"Come on, we have to cheer Kyo on." Die grinned which almost made Shinya's heart stop and a cold sweat break out before he realized his friend was half joking.

"Okay, I guess I can be a little late home." With that said, both boys latched onto his wrists, as if afraid he'd change his mind halfway, and began leading him to the empty field a little ways away from the junior high.

"Who do you think is gonna win?" Toshiya asked, tucking a stray strand of black hair behind his ear.

"judging from what happened at lunch, pretty sure Kyo is gonna beat Subaru's ass." Die answered, Shinya nodded along. His stomach churned and he had a deep, ugly feeling that he wasn't going to enjoy seeing his crush get hurt.

"Kyo, of course." Toshiya nodded thoughtfully.

"Yeah, I'd put my money on the Yokai." Shinya rolled his eyes, always annoyed when anybody referred to Kyo as that.

"Looks like everyone is mostly here." Die commented as they joined the other awaiting boys in an expectant circle.

Shinya's heart lurched at the sight of Kyo; unaffectedly sitting on the grass with his knees pressed into his chest, the cut lip now bandaged.

"Where's Subaru?" Another student called, seemingly irritated at the bully's absence.

"What a coward!"

"Ha! He's the one who's a sissy!"

Kyo rolled his eyes and pointed across the field, everyone's eyes traveled to the spot, seeing Subaru and cronies making their way towards the circle of students.

Kyo got up and dusted off his pants with a small sigh. Shinya desperately wanted to reach out and make him change his mind; wanting to say that fighting solved nothing and that he couldn't bear to see him hurt, yet he stayed still beside Toshiya and Die, fully knowing these words would not only brand him a 'sissy', they would be of no use.

"Took long enough." The shortest student coughed and removed his hands from his pockets, preparing himself for any sucker punches or surprise attacks.

"Doesn't matter, I'm here now." Subaru smirked and threw his fist in Kyo's direction, starting the fight.

The punch barely grazed the shorter student's shoulder and instead of throwing one of his own, Kyo tackled him again and both boys fell into the dirt.

Shinya watched as they struggled to get the upper hand; while Kyo was nimble and flexible, effectively squirming out of Subaru's grasps every time the other boy had him pinned down, Subaru was burly and had strength that very much surpassed Kyo's. They wrestled until Kyo was sitting on his chest and punching the bigger's boy's face, very much looking like the wild animal Shinya had gotten a glimpse of in the classroom.

The teen closed his eyes, not wanting to see Kyo like this. So very angry and primal, he felt a shiver go down his spine and vowed to himself to never be on the receiving end of that tangible angry, hatred. He couldn't bear to see the white-knuckled grasp the shorter student had on the bully's neck.

"Okay okay! I think Kyo won." Another, older student announced, looking very disturbed by what had transpired between the boys in the dirt. However, it was as if Kyo was now deaf, as he continued on with his punching until Subaru was no longer reacting in pain and was out cold.

"Stop! You're going to kill him!" Shinya opened his eyes again, fearing that subaru had gotten the upper hand and was hurting Kyo, but all he saw was several boys pulling an enraged Kyo off of the prone bully.

Kyo finally stopped struggling and seemed to gain his sense, he looked at the bleeding teen on the ground and then lazily looked to the faces of those watching him. His eyes stopped at Shinya, as the subject of his gaze quickly tried to change his expression from 'horrified' to 'feigned interest'. Shinya had a feeling it didn't work, as Kyo's eyes left him feeling empty.

Judgment.

For a split moment, Shinya had judged the object of his affections. For a second he doubted his own feelings, for how could he possible like someone so animalistic and crazy?

But the feelings that had bloomed were still present.

"Woah! Can't believe Kyo won!"

Kyo turned his back to the uproarious congratulations that almost every single watcher heaped upon him.

However, everyone fell into shocked silence as Kyo's body collapsed into the dirt, a medium sized rock laying beside his bloodied head.

Shinya turned his head to the direction of where he thought the rock had come from. The perpetrator, who was another crony of Subaru's, was holding a much larger rock. Quick as a flash, the teen holding the rock began running towards Kyo's unconscious body.

"Stop!" Shinya yelled and was relieved to see that not only Die, but Toshiya as well, had sprung into action. Both boys ran at the rock wielder and took him down, Toshiya kicking the rock far away from them as they scuffled to keep the boy under their grasp.

"Are you a fucking idiot?! You could've killed him! Get help!" Die screamed, still kicking and punching.

After much violent scuffling, the thug finally gave in and let Die subdue him. Toshiya jumped off of him and grabbed Shinya's thin wrist and started running towards the school while the other boys either stayed by Kyo's side or ran in different directions in order to escape getting in trouble for witnessing the fight.

"We need to hurry!" Toshiya huffed, out of breath and panicking. Shinya was silent, stunned and scared by what he had just seen. He saw a teacher walking out of the classroom and immediately ran to get their attention.

With barely any explanation to the teacher, they hurried back and saw Die screaming in anger at Subaru and his friend, while Kyo was still laying on the ground.

"Thank God you finally made it!" Die exclaimed in relief.

"Sorry it took so long," Toshiya heaved and led the teacher to Kyo's body still face down in the dirt. The boys had been barked at by Die to not move him just in case something happened.

"I'll take it from here, you boys go home!" All three boys protested, but they were ultimately forced to leave as an ambulance came for both Kyo and Subaru.

Shinya, still very much upset by what happened, quickly bade his friends goodbye and ran home. He didn't stop running until he was safely in his room with his back against the door.

Once there, his legs gave out and sobs racked his body.

He could've sworn that Kyo wasn't breathing.

He didn't want to think of Kyo dying right in front of him, the other boy so lifeless and still. Shinya retched violently and slid down to the floor, cradling his knees to his chest while desperately trying to not have a mental break down.

"Please be okay, please be okay." He murmured to himself in a broken mantra, "this can't happen again." 


	7. Courage Doesn't Grow On Trees

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shinya's anger leads him to a devilish plan to get back at Kyo's bullies.

The next day at school had been bleak for Shinya, he got up late and headed to the junior high with sluggish and depressed steps. There was no point to waking up, he thought, if Kyo wasn't going to be in the book room quietly reading or sitting beside him in class.

He marched himself to homeroom with a scowl and head bowed, sliding into his seat with barely a hello to Toshimasa or Daisuke.

Both boys were equally as quiet, except their silence was one of guilt as they had been the ones to drag Shinya to see the fight.

"You alright, Shinya?" Toshimasa asked gingerly, unsure of how to talk to his friend who was obviously in an upset state of mind.

"Yeah," was all Shinya managed to get out before bending his head down and pretending to be engrossed in his book. Daisuke and Toshimasa simply glanced at each other, a knowing look being shared between the both of them.

"Yuta dropped by to see him this morning in the hospital," Die began, smiling lightly when Shinya picked his head up and gave him a questioning look.

"How is he?" The light haired teen asked eagerly.

"He said Kyo was doing good, just a headache. Apparently he's being let out today but won't be back til next week." He was a little disappointed to hear that, but nevertheless, he was relieved that Kyo was alright.

The rest of the day had passed in a boring blur, Shinya could not focus on any of the work at hand and instead resorted to doodling in his notebook idly. Even at lunch, he was silent but marginally more cordial than this morning to his two friends. They were grateful, as they weren't used to an upset Shinya and preferred their friend to be his normally quietly cheerful self.

"Hey Shin-chan, let's go get ice cream! On me!" Daisuke swung his arm over the taller teen with a roguish smile, somewhat startling his friend as Shinya had been walking alone.

"Yeah, there's a place me and Die go to all the time." Toshiya added, letting his best friend drape his other arm on him.

"Sure let's go," Shinya conceded after a moment of thought. Both of his friend's cheered and happily led him to their favorite ice cream vendor.

~

The next day had been the same as the one before it; Shinya had barely willed himself to go to school and practically avoided everybody besides his two friends.

However, even his friends seemed on edge as he passed by their desks to sit down, both boys whispering incessantly with each other. They stopped dead; Toshiya making an angry 'tsking' noise while Shinya could feel the anger radiating off of the former red head.

Curious, Shinya looked towards the door and felt his stomach flare in angry heat. There, shuffling to the classroom with a black eye and a purplish-yellow face was Subaru.

The coward.

The reason Kyo was hurt so badly.

His fists clenched in fury, wanting so badly to make him hurt more for what he had done. Yet, he couldn't move. He knew without a doubt he would lose in a fight with him, no matter how much anger fueled him, and it would be selfish to count on Die or Toshiya to save him.

So he sat, seething in painful rage, eyes prickling with burning tears at the edges.

But even through his motionlessness, he knew he had to do something to not only get back at Subaru, but all of his cowardly followers.

With this vengeful thought, his evil plan began taking shape.

~

For his plan to work, Shinya hastily said his goodbyes to Toshiya and Die, telling them that he had to be home at a particular time. Which wasn't a total lie, he thought mischievously. In order to get the needed items for his revenge, he needed to beat his father home and sneak into his home office.

The only noise he could hear was his feet pounding on the road as he hurried, breathing fast in excitement of his divine retribution for the person he cared about so fondly.

He would show them their place, these thoughts made a maniacal chuckle bubbly forth which doubled as he entered his house and found it empty. Quickly, he ran into the home office and searched the drawers for the needed item. He found them in the second drawer with random paper clips and alligator clips.

A box of colorful plastic tacks.

Sharp and pointy, he was pleased at his findings and hurried into his room to hide them in his bag save for one which he rolled around his fingers. He pricked himself and relished in evil excitement at the pain it brought him, surely he could teach those good for nothings their lesson with more than just one. A handful would just about do it.

Yet, the next day he had found himself losing courage to do his vengeful deed. The fear of being found out terrified him, as he knew that they would beat him if he was caught in the act.

Courage doesn't grow on trees, Shinya thought bitterly, recalling a line from an English program his father had been watching the night before. At least, that's what he thought they said, he wasn't really good at English.

"Something up?" Toshimasa asked, his head cocked at the sight of his friend's head laying on the desk hopelessly.

"It's nothing." Shinya replied, Toshimasa shook his head.

"It's not nothing, Shinya."

"I'm just trying to get the courage to do something and it's really hard." He said vaguely, nevertheless, Toshimasa nodded.

"Are you trying to take money out of your dad's coin jar?" He asked with a light smile.

"Just do it and think about the consequences later, either way there's a good chance you won't be caught." He comforted before Shinya could deny that that was the issue at hand.

"Right," he said with a firm tone, letting his friend's words motivate him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaahhhh;;
> 
> I hate this chapter, it's so choppy and weird ugh. I'll most likely come back and fix it eventually. A small case of writer's block hit me at this part hence why I hate it so much lol.
> 
> Next chapter should be updated at the end of this week~ 
> 
> Oh yeah and before I forget, according to an interview Shinya got in trouble by taking coins out of his parents coin jar, it made me laugh so I had to include it haha.


	8. Mummy Boy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shinya's plan comes to fruition.

  
Despite Toshimasa's pep talk, Shinya still found it difficult to slip the tacks into the other boys' shoes. Nevermind the right opportunity to do so, yet the weekend gave him ample time to think of different ways to do it. While hanging out with Toshimasa and Daisuke, he often thought of the tacks still stashed in his book bag.

He knew that he would have to do it on Monday, resolve intact or not. There was no getting around it, he couldn't face Kyo in any way if he didn't.

Luckily, on Monday Shinya felt his courage finally settle itself in his heart, as Kyo finally made his appearance. The shorter boy slipped into the classroom with only one minute to spare before being counted as late, Shinya tried not to look at his bandaged head, which was wrapped so haphazardly and carelessly it seemed that the boy had done it himself.

He swallowed, seeing flecks of browned blood starkly contrasting against the cotton white gauze. He knew that today was to be the day he exacted his revenge, Shinya couldn't bear to see that bandage without knowing that he had done something to those who had caused its' appearance.

"Terachi-kun, Andou-kun." The teacher called out, both boys looked up to their teacher with questioning eyes.

"We need four more Kanji textbooks," he sighed in annoyance, gesturing to the group of boys who had spilled tea on theirs.

"Why can't they get em?" Daisuke asked, not unkind but it was obvious he had no patience for this.

"If I can't trust them to not spill drinks on their books, how can I trust them to go get them?" The teacher explained, pushing up his glasses with a long suffering sigh.

"Just go." Huffing, Daisuke got up and waited for Shinya to stop rooting around in his bag. Shinya had fished out the unopened pack of tacks and placed it in his pocket, being careful to not let anyone see.

"Yes, teacher." He smiled while nervouslu jamming his hand into the pocket with the forbidden items in an effort to camouflage them.

~

"What a jerk," Die ranted, not holding any of his annoyed thoughts back as he recounted the different ways their homeroom teacher had had it out for him and Toshimasa since the year before.

"Um, Die?" Shinya, who was walking slightly behind his friend, made a quick effort to look as uncomfortable as possible.

"Yeah?" Die turned around and observed the other teen who was bouncing on his heels.

"I really need to go to the bathroom, can I meet you in the book room?" Die nodded in understanding.

"Okay, see ya in a minute." He said before starting off in the direction of the room. Shinya grinned and hurried to the front of the school where all the outside shoes were held in a cubby.

The light haired teen ripped the tacks package with his teeth and began putting handfuls of the sharp, colorful nails into the shoes, making sure that they were all facing up and placing them down careful so as not to jostle them out of place.

It took him only a couple of minutes and then he was rushing off to the book room to meet up with Die.

"Took you long enough," Die said as he handed his friend two of the heavy kanji books and taking the other two into his arms.

"Yeah sorry, I've been holding it in since this morning." He grinned, Die hesitated for a moment and peered at Shinya with an unreadable expression.

"You seem really happy." Shinya could feel himself beginning to turn pale, but he shook it off to the best of his ability.

"Can't underestimate the power of a good pee." He cringed inwardly at the words spewing forth from his mouth, Die on the other hand, burst into laughter at that.

"Guess you're right," he agreed with an amused grin, already assuring Shinya that he was definitely going to tell Toshimasa about this.

~

Shinya was on pins and needles throughout the day, anxiously awaiting what would surely be the crowning moment of his revenge plot. He smiled to himself deviously and stole a glance at Kyo; the other boy was aimlessly writing in a green notebook that he kept on his person for as long as Shinya had been watching him. His pencil stilled and Shinya hastily shifted his eyes back to his own desk, his face flaming.

"Hey, Shinya wanna head to the takoyaki stall after class?" Toshimasa asked while playing with Shinya's pencil.

"Sure, sounds fun." The other teen agreed almost instantly.

"Awesome, Daisuke's already downstairs." The darker haired boy grinned and quickly helped Shinya pack up as the bell had rung only a minute prior, but Daisuke had already made it a habit to sneak out during the last couple minutes of study hall. Meanwhile, Toshimasa had decided to hang back with Shinya.

"You wanna come too, Kyo?" Toshimasa turned to the shorter student, asking as if it were an afterthought.

"Nah." The taller boy just shrugged and gestured for Shinya to follow him out.

Both boys chatted idly as they made their way to the shoe cubbies, every step heightened Shinya's anxiety as he was unsure of what could happen.

What if they blame Kyo? His eyes widened in fear, feeling idiotic for forcing Kyo back into this mess.

"I wonder what the commotion is?" Toshiya commented as they heard angry yelling, both boys turned the corner to see Subaru tearfully sitting on the floor, his white school socks stained red.

He wasn't the only one. Two other boys, one of them being the kid who hit Kyo with the rock (Shinya noted with dark satisfaction), sitting on the floor with injured feet.

"Hey!" Toshiya exclaimed in fury, Shinya's eyes flicked up from the injured boys to two of Subaru's friends holding Die against the wall, screaming in his face as their captive struggled to break free.

Toshiya was gone from Shinya's side in a flash as he ran over to Die's captors and tackled one of them. This sudden attack distracted the other boy long enough for Die to deliver a resounding punch to the nose. The other boy backed off immediately and elected to yank his friend, who was currently wrestling on the floor with Toshiya, away from his scuffle on the ground instead of trying to attack Die.

Die helped up his friend once the other boys backed off and frowned, brushing off the dirt from his friend's school uniform in annoyance.

"You should've stayed out of it, Toshimasa." The taller teen frowned and pushed Die's hands off of him with a huff.

"Shut it, I'm not letting my best friend get roughed up by some of those idiots." Die smirked, but then turned to Subaru and the other boys on the floor.

"I didn't do that." He pointed to the shoes with tacks embedded in them.

"If it wasn't you, then who was it?!" Subaru barked in pain, tearfully cradling his feet.

"I don't know, not us though." Toshiya said, arms crossed.

"What's going on here?!" A teacher came rushing down the hall towards them, all three of the friends rolled their eyes.

"They," Subaru pointed an accusatory finger to the trio, "put tacks in my shoes!"

"Is that true!?" The teacher rounded on them, fury in her eyes.

"No! You can ask anyone, I walked down here and everyone was already on the floor!" Die tried to explain.

"You got to leave during class, you could've done it then!" Die shook his head and turned pleadingly to the teacher.

"You can ask Shinya," Die's eyes drifted to the light haired teen imploringly, "He went down with me, we just went to the book room to get more kanji text books.

"Yes ma'am, I was with him the whole entire time and after getting the books we went straight back to class." She nodded stiffly and turned to Toshimasa.

"I was in class the whole entire time, you can ask our teacher!" The dark haired teen explained whilst putting his hands up in defense.

"You three," the teacher turned to the injured boys on the floor, "go to the infirmary and I'll get the principal to go down there."

The boys nodded and attempted to hobble to the nurse, the teacher then rounded on the other three boys.

"Go home for right now, but I'll have word with your teacher to back up what you said. If there's any mistake, all three of you will be suspended. Now get out!" She hissed, the boys needn't be told twice. They hurried out of the school in bewilderment and instead of heading to the takoyaki stall, they all decided to go home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the long wait, this week has been busy;;
> 
> Ah class is starting up again soon~
> 
> Hope everyone is having a nice week so far!
> 
> Next chapter will be up at the end of next week~
> 
> Til then everyone be healthy!


	9. The Yokai's Revenge

The next day had been unusually quiet; whispers carried along the corridors of the heinous deed and of Subaru's misfortune. Everyone's eyes seemed to follow the three friends where ever they went, gawking and quiet obvious about it. This increased attention was not only making Shinya's skin crawl, but Die's as well, as the other boy was constantly squirming in his seat. Toshiya, on the other hand, seemed to be enjoying all the eyes on his person as he would flash them menacing smirks that spooked those watching him.

"Nishimura Kyo-kun," the teacher had called after he came back into the class from morning break. He beckoned the student to come to his desk and handed him a slip of paper, Kyo nodded stiffly and headed back to his desk and buried his face in his arms. Shinya fidgeted nervously, knowing full well that Kyo was a more viable suspect that Toshiya, Die, and himself.

Shinya noticed anxiously that the eyes that had once been on him and his friends were now settled onto Kyo, but the shorter didn't seem to notice or care.

Once lunch break rolled around, Kyo was the first to get up and head out. After his departure from the class, the students immediately busted into rushed talking, as if they were afraid Kyo would be back in mere seconds.

"He did it! I'm sure of it, who else would?" One student accused, pointing a finger to the closed door.

"He was in class with us when it happened though." Another, more level headed, student pointed out.

"So? Maybe he really is a demon and did some weird satanic ritual." The same student from before said with a seriousness that made the other students laugh at him.

"No way, they don't exist." Toshiya rolled his eyes, heaving a long suffering sigh.

"Well, then explain why his parents practically drag him to the temple every day after school?" Toshiya shrugged.

"Maybe that's just what they do." The other boy shook his head.

"They're most likely trying to get the demon out of him," A boy sitting behind Shinya suggested.

"Yeah! My aunt lives right next to their house and she says she hears screaming at night. Like some animal is being killed or something." This revelation made the whole class go quiet.

"Seriously?" Die asked quietly, looking at the boy with wide eyes.

"Dead serious. She said it usually happens at around midnight and doesn't stop until an hour or two later." A collective shiver ran through the class, each student seeming to go pale.

"I don't believe that, maybe it's coming from somewhere else." Shinya said softly, refusing to believe the unfounded rumors.

"Shut it sissy, you're probably going to be the first one sacrificed by him!" The boy who had first spoken up about Kyo hissed petulantly.

"Watch it Sosuke, or you'll be the one who ends up sacrificed." Die snarled and picked up his sharpened pencil threateningly. The boy quickly bowed his head and turned around, making the class laugh.

"Anyway, all of this crap is stupid. Yokais don't exist and the person who did it is probably in another class, plus it's not like he didn't have it coming." Die announced with finality, effectively ending the current discussion on whether or not Kyo was some sort of satanic supernatural being.

Shinya was relieved, but knew that this would do little to quell the rumors that no doubt had been spreading since that morning.

Just minutes before lunch break ended, Kyo came back with a blank expression, or rather one of minute irritation. Shinya hid his face, feeling sick to his stomach that he was the cause of all these rumors.

In the end, he wondered if by trying to help Kyo, he just made things worse.

~

"Hey, Toshiya?" Shinya asked gingerly, turning to the teenage boy sitting beside him on the bench as they waited for Die to 'buy' his snacks.

"What's up?" Toshiya looked up from the same music magazine that Die had lent to Shinya.

"I'm the one who put tacks in Subaru's shoes." Toshiya closed the magazine and regarded his friend with wide eyes and an opened mouth. It took him a bit to finally muster up the sense to say something.

"Y-you did it?" His tone unbelieving, Shinya swallowed and nodded hesitantly.

"Y-yeah."

"Why though? I mean Subaru's an ass, but I don't think he ever messed with you." He wasn't angry, just curious as to what possessed his meek friend to do such a thing.

"I was mad about what he did to Kyo, it wasn't fair. So I hid them in his shoes, I didn't think Kyo would be blamed for it." Shinya bowed his head in shame, but an understanding pat on his shoulder made him feel slightly better.

"Do you think I should tell him I did it?" Toshiya looked at him in shock and vehemently shook his head.

"No! What if you get suspended?" It was Shinya's turn to shake his head.

"It's really not fair for Kyo, everyone already thinks he's some kind of evil demon or something. I just made things worse." He explained miserably, shoulders slumping.

"Look, if it'll make you feel better, I guess go ahead and tell him. Hopefully he won't go to the principal. Besides, he doesn't really seem like the type to go the teachers and if he tries to beat you up, me and Die can handle him."

"Handle what?" Die asked as he walked up to them while popping his gum.

"Shinya is the one who put the tacks in Subaru's shoes and he's going to fess up to Kyo." Toshiya explained briefly.

"Toshiya!" The dark haired teen simply waved his hand aside.

"Oh yeah, if he tries anything we'll fuck him up." Die said matter of factly, making Shinya blush but relieved at the same time.

"Thanks guys," He said sincerely, feeling happily loved by his two best friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since this chapter is rather short, chapter 10 will be up in a couple of more days like around Tuesday/Wednesday, most likely Tuesday~
> 
> Thank you everyone for reading thus far and in light of recent world events, please please stay safe!


	10. Coming Clean

Shinya awoke from a fitful sleep, eyes unfocused and his brain abhorring the idea of getting up. Moaning in annoyance, he did just that and went about his morning routine, absolutely dreading seeing Kyo in the book room for the first time. He swallowed, hating this feeling welling up inside of him; it was a mixture of guilt and fear.

'What if he tries to beat me up?' Shinya thought sullenly. 'I deserve it but...' He shook his head.

'If he wants to hit me, then I'll just have to take it.'

"You okay?" His father piped up from the kitchen table, eyes peering up from the mail he had received the day before.

"Uh yeah, just a test today." His son lied easily, before grabbing his school bag off of the wooden chair in front of the table.

"You're smart, you'll do great!" His father gave him a goofy smile and a thumbs up which made his son laugh. The older man grinned, extremely happy to make his son laugh as it had been a long while since he had last done so.

"Thanks dad," Shinya smiled and waved goodbye.

"No problem." His father replied with another thumbs up.

~

"Gonna tell him today?" Toshiya asked after jogging up to his friend, Shinya glanced at him and quickly noticed that Die was absent.

"Where's Die?" The taller boy poked Shinya's side with a bony finger in warning.

"Don't change the subject Terachi Shinya." Shinya sighed in defeat and nodded.

"I'm telling him after class today, I don't want to get beaten up first thing in the morning." Toshiya agreed and patted his friend's back in solidarity.

"So, is Die sick?" The slighter teen sighed in barely masked annoyance and glared at the ground.

"He's gonna be really late today, probably not even going to come to school today." Shinya raised an eyebrow at this; Daisuke's mother wasn't one to let the boy skip school altogether.

"Why? What's going on with him?" The look of pure anger intensified, making Shinya wonder if asking was such a good idea as he had never seen Toshiya this peeved before.

"He's going to skip with his new girlfriend at the Girl's Junior High today." He replied with an aggravated huff of breath.

"Wow, I didn't know he had a girlfriend." The slighter teen laughed mirthlessly and shook his head.

"I didn't either until this morning, and to think I always get up early to walk with him to school and he just ditches me with that stupid excuse!" He raged and kicked a rock angrily down the road.

"I mean come on! How are you going to ditch your best friend over a dumb girl!" Shinya nodded in sympathy, he had an inkling that there was more to this than what Toshiya was letting on. Die had left them to their own devices before without much of an angry outburst from his best friend, so maybe Toshiya was jealous of Die getting a girlfriend before him or...?

"You like him." Shinya spilled out before he could stop himself, he quickly slapped his hands onto his mouth, but he feared the damage had already been done. Toshiya had walked a couple of steps ahead of him, but upon hearing this he froze. He slowly turned to face his friend with an unreadable look, which frightened Shinya as he was unaware of what might happen next.

"I'm-I'm not weird like that! Don't be stupid!" Toshiya spat out, but even then those words sounded unsure and wavering.

"I was just playing around, I'm sorry." Shinya cringed at his mistake, but Toshiya just shook his head.

"Sorry, I shouldn't have snapped at you like that. It's just really annoying, ya know?" The lighter-haired teen agreed awkwardly, never really having a best friend and finding the scenario somewhat difficult to relate to. Nevertheless, he nodded and both boys silently agreed to change the subject for the remainder of their walk to school.

~

For the rest of the day, Toshiya was still silently fuming while Shinya chewed anxiously on his lower lip. He was absolutely dreading his impending confession to Kyo, the other boy was aimlessly sketching on the assignment that was due at the end of class. From his vantage point, Shinya could make out a stick figure getting mercilessly decapitated with a long cross that he guessed was supposed to be a sword of some sort. What really caught his attention, however, was the fact that Kyo was wearing black winter gloves.

It was neither winter nor would it be for several months, not to mention that it was already nearing the end of the day and he had yet to take them off.

Shinya shrugged, Kyo's winter gloves were the least of his worries. He just hoped the shorter boy would keep them on when he punched him in order to soften the blow.

"Okay class, for those of you not finished with the math assignment please take it home and finish. If you are finished, please put them on my desk." The class did so while both Shinya and Kyo shoved their paper in their book bags.

"Alright, you all are dismissed." The teacher bowed and left the room; Shinya remained seated while the other students busied themselves with getting their things together and leaving in groups. Toshiya clasped his friend on the shoulder with a grim expression, his eyes screaming 'you can still back out!', but Shinya shook his head. Toshiya sighed and left the room with one last pleading glimpse, leaving Shinya alone with Kyo, who was still gathering his things.

"Um Kyo? Got a second?" Shinya swallowed and coughed out, inwardly screaming when Kyo paused from packing and shot him a cocked eyebrow.

"Yeah?" He placed his bag on the desk and turned to fully give Shinya his attention, curious, as the taller boy never really uttered more than stilted one word sentences to him.

"Um, I-I," Shinya took a moment, "I'm-the-one-who-put-tacks-in-Subaru's-shoes!" He gasped in one breath and slammed his eyes shut, fully anticipating the painful punch he knew he deserved.

"Uh, what? I didn't understand what you said." Shinya opened his eyes to see Kyo looking at him with his head titled to one side in question.

"I'm the one who put tacks in Subaru's shoes." He repeated in a much slower pace, his eyes looking anywhere but the perplexed boy in front of him.

"Uh, okay." Kyo nodded, "why though?"

Shinya shrugged and finally brought himself to look at Kyo, his expression wasn't one of anger, but confusion.

"He really hurt you, so I wanted to pay him back a little. I know tacks can't compare to what happened, but it's a start, right?" He babbled to an ever increasingly astonished Kyo.

"Um, thanks...But you really don't need to get in trouble because of me." It was Shinya's turn to be confused as the other boy resumed his packing.

"You're....You're not gonna tell the principal?" Kyo shook his head and slung his bag across his shoulders.

"No, the principal told me that there's no real suspects for what happened since I was in class the whole day and Die gave you an alibi. So, no suspects no trouble." He gestured for the other boy to get his stuff, but Shinya remained rooted to the spot.

"Seriously?"

"Yeah, it's better to be quiet about this anyway. Let's get going, I don't wanna get locked in." Shinya grinned widely and grabbed his things, feeling his heart swell as they both walked through the halls and of out the school. Sadly, Kyo had to walk home in the opposite direction, but he gave Shinya a wave and a goodbye which made the taller teen inwardly swoon.

After parting ways, Shinya ran home and bumped into his father as he bounded into the hallway after taking his shoes off.

"Someone looks really happy," his father commented and gave his son a pat on the back.

"Yeah, I have a feeling I passed that test!" His son sent him a toothy smile and gave him a giddy hug.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah;; I'm starting college tomorrow but uploads shouldn't be affected at all~   
> How is everyone doing?  
> I hope you all are doing well and if you live in the US, Happy Memorial Day!  
> See everyone next week for another upload~!


	11. Fledgling Friendship

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kyo and Shinya's friendship is blooming while Die and Toshiya's is on the rocks.

"Do you want to go get takoyaki after school?" Shinya asked as he sat next to Kyo in the book room, grinning wildly as their arms touched for the briefest of moments.

"Um, sure. Are you going with Die and Toshiya?" Kyo lifted his brown eyes from his book and observed the taller boy serenely.

"Uh, I think Die's going on a date and Toshiya said he'd be busy when we were walking together a minute ago." The shorter boy nodded and returned his eyes to his book.

"In that case, can we get burgers instead?" Shinya paused for a moment and regarded Kyo with a confused expression.

"Burgers?"

"Yeah, at McDonalds."

"I didn't think you'd like American food..." Kyo shrugged and gave him a meek grin.

"You and my parents both," Shinya chuckled and nodded, looking forward to getting dinner with his crush.

"Yeah, let's get burgers." He was pretty sure his goofy smile would give away his happiness, but Kyo just hummed and gathered his stuff as the bell was about to ring.

"Oh wait, don't you have to go to the Temple after school?" Kyo froze for a second while an odd expression flashed across his face.

"Not today, I haven't really been going lately. How do you know I go?" It was Shinya's turn to freeze, he quickly tried to think of a viable excuse but decided to tell the truth instead.

"One of the boys in our class mentioned it the other day..." The shorter student nodded in understanding.

"It was probably that asshole Sosuke, his aunt is always trying to shove her nose in our business. We should go to class now," Kyo sighed, as if lamenting the fact that their time in the quiet room was coming to an end.

Shinya followed him out and soon both boys were deep in a conversation about Doraemon and Cheburashka.

~

"Ready to go?" Shinya turned to Kyo after both of his other friends bade him goodbye; Die seemingly bored whilst Toshiya was highly aggravated.

"Yeah," Kyo gave his friend a quick nod and grabbed his school bag before swinging it over his shoulder.

"Do you usually go out for burgers?" The taller of the two asked with an amused grin, still unbelieving of his new friend's taste in food, as Kyo was usually thought to be more traditional than most other students in their class.

"Not all the time, whatever's cheap will do." Kyo explained, guiding his friend out of the school and to the closest McDonalds. Once they got there, both boys ordered their food and sat down at the most secluded table.

"I didn't know Andou-kun was dating already." Kyo said after he took a bite of his burger, Shinya shrugged and picked at his fries.

"Same here, Toshiya is the one who told me." Shinya knew that whatever Die was up to wasn't really his business, but he couldn't help but feel a little annoyed that the former red head had taken so long to tell him. They were friends, weren't they? Not to mention he took it far more in stride than Toshiya, who was now on his fourth day (or fifth, Shinya had stopped keeping count around the third day) of his  angry melancholia.

Now, it seemed that everyone in their class knew about Die and his girlfriend. She was rumored to be one of the most popular girls in her school, and Shinya didn't doubt that as his friend was rather popular in their class as well. Despite his annoyance, however, he could understand why his friend kept it hidden for the better part of two weeks, as he was being incessantly pestered by the other boys.

"He seems kinda bummed by it," Kyo murmured before taking a drink of his soda, Shinya nodded sheepishly. He couldn't help but remember his conversation with an irritated Toshiya, it was none of his business but he was somewhat convinced that Toshiya's anger wasn't just about not having his own girlfriend.

"Yeah, he'll get over it though." When they break up, the taller boy added in his thoughts.

"What about you, are you dating anyone?" The intrusive question threw Shinya for a loop as he regarded the other teen with a surprised expression.

"A-ah, no." He answered with an embarrassed blush, Kyo merely took a bite out of his burger in thought.

"Yeah, girls are troublesome." Shinya had to laugh at that, of course Kyo would be the one to think relationships would be troublesome. Deep down, he felt something inside him ache a little.

"What about you?" He asked a little too earnestly, it didn't seem that Kyo caught on however.

"Like I said, girls are too....much work. Plus, none of the girls at the other school are my type....And with my reputation, none of them probably have the guts to confess to me." He dismissed the notion immediately, his tone becoming bitter.

"They all have short hair right?" The taller teen remarked, his hand subconsciously brushing his own hair behind his ear.

"I guess, your's is getting pretty long though, isn't it?" Shinya grinned, absolute happiness washed over him in response to Kyo's observation.

"Yeah, the teachers might make me cut it," He chuckled, knowing full well that if such a thing did happen he would probably just be more determined to grow it out again.

"You should keep it like that until then," Kyo said much to his friend's smitten giddiness.

~

The next couple of days had been spent in utter bliss for Shinya, as the teen had spent most of that either hanging out with Kyo or sitting beside him in class. He was walking on clouds just at the thought of going to the book room or walking around Kyoto with his crush, their hands innocently brushing against each other whilst reading (or in Shinya's case, pretending) or bumping his fingers fleetingly on Kyo's arms while they kept in step with each other.

It had been such a perfect week that he barely even noticed Die and Toshiya fighting amongst themselves. Their fights were usually over random things that irritated them, but they carried the same tangible feelings of hurting anger from Toshiya and confused anger from Die, but it was anger nonetheless. With such anger, it had to be expressed, but neither boy was willing to spit out the reason for these constant agressions. At least until that particular day when Die had decided that he had had enough of Toshiya's bad attitude.

"What the hell is your problem?" Die finally spat out as the trio was making their way from class and to the outside world.

"What do you mean 'my problem'?" Toshiya seethed, seemingly to be in a constant state of radiating irritation.

Meanwhile, Shinya was walking between them whilst praying that Kyo would come up and somehow save him from his friends being annoying and naive brats. How could they both be so dense? All he could manage was a quick roll of his eyes.

"You've been acting like a...A bitch ever since I told you I'm dating Matsuri." Toshiya rolled his eyes and sighed.

"Not everything revolves around you and your stupid girlfriend." Die laughed mirthlessly and glared at Toshiya.

"You know, if you wanted a girlfriend you could've just said so, instead of getting all pissy with me for getting one before you." Toshiya shrugged Die's comment off coldly. Shinya merely coughed and tried to pretend he was anywhere but in between these fighting friends.

"I don't want some stupid bitch hanging off of me." Toshiya remarked with such loathing that Shinya could scarce believe it was his usually cheerful friend saying it.

"Really? Because to me, it looks like you really need to get your dick sucked." Both Shinya and Toshiya stopped walking, the lighter haired teen turned to Toshiya. His face was pale and it looked like tears were threatening to fall, but suddenly that angry face fell into a pitiful expression of his masked hurt, then the anger was back again.

"You're such a fucking asshole! I never want to see you again!" Toshiya yelled and took off running. Shinya turned to Die almost immediately and raised his palm.

The slap shocked both of them.

"How could you say that to him!? Can't you see he's hurt because all you've been doing is hanging out with that girl?" Die shook his head in disbelief, his hand coming up to cradle his bruising cheek.

"I didn't mean it! I have to go after him!" Shinya's scowl deepened and he shook his head.

"You've done enough! He can't be around you like this!" Die's face became it's own version of pitiful as he looked longingly in the direction his friend had ran off to.

"I can't lose him, Shinya. Not for something stupid like this..." Shinya shook his head again.

"You already lost him Daisuke," however, Shinya knew with utter sadness that it was the other way around.

Toshimasa had lost Daisuke.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update! Hope everyone is doing well!  
> The next update will be on Friday! See you guys then!


	12. Duality

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Through Toshiya's suffering, Shinya has an important realization.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, long time no see guys! I'm really sorry it took me months upon months to update this story. Right after I updated last in the Summer, my parents dropped the bomb on me that we're moving! After that I got seriously depressed and couldn't bring myself to write anymore. I started to write again in September but I had no internet access until recently. I'm really sorry, guys. 
> 
> Also, sorry this chapter is so short! I'm currently working on a special chapter for Die and Totchi.

After Shinya's exchange with Die, he hurried after Toshiya in an effort to find him before he did something rash. He knew the taller boy was hurt beyond measure, and those who were hurting are prone to bad decisions.

"Toshimasa! Toshimasa!" He ran past vendors and buildings, hoping and praying that his friend hadn't ran too far.

He stopped to catch his breath, hands planted on his knees from the effort of running, then between each huffing breath he heard the muted sound of sobbing. It was coming from the alley a couple of steps ahead of him, with a heavy heart he walked to the entrance and saw Toshimasa sitting against the dirtied wall. His legs were pressed against his chest while one hand was shoved up against his mouth in an effort to be silent and the other was furiously rubbing at his eyes, willing the tears to stop falling.

"....Toshimasa...." Said boy flinched and looked up, giving his friend a watery smile.

"Go away, I'm fine." His watery smile widened, but Shinya could see it wavering at the corners.

"You're not fine and that's okay." His friend looked down at his knees, his eyes downcast and pouring.

"What's wrong with me, Shinya? You're the one who guessed it, so tell me why I'm messed up." Shinya sat down beside Toshimasa and wrapped a protective arm around him.

"I guess....I guess that's....That's two of us then. We're both messed up." Toshimasa turned to his friend incredulously.

"Y-You too?" Shinya nodded almost shyly.

"I think....Maybe if we try hard enough it'll go away. This only makes us hurt and its painful..." Toshimasa nodded.

"....So if we really make an effort, it'll go away with time and we'll be normal..." Shinya said, knowing that time could dull pain but never erase it. His heartbroken friend buried his face in his knees once more.

"I hate him so much, but I like him twice as much as I hate him. How does that make sense?! But....It just does..." Shinya nodded in agreement, knowing full well that one day he would be in the same situation as Toshimasa with Kyo. That realization made his stomach drop. He had to get over this stupid crush, if not....He didn't even want to think about it.

"If he's happy with her...I'll get over it. I have to, I can't live without him in my life and I know he can't either." Toshimasa threw his head back against the wall, glaring up at the sky with self loathing burning inside of him.

"That sounds so pitiful, I hate it." Shinya shook his head.

"It's realistic." He said with heavy sorrow.

~

"Oh, you're back!" The older Terachi said as Shinya walked into the kitchen with an unhappy expression.

"Sorry, a friend needed help with homework," he answered dully, Mr. Terachi just nodded.

"My son is so smart," He said with a happy sigh, too busy with his paperwork to properly assess his son's mood.

"Ah! Before I forget, it's going to rain a lot tomorrow so remember to get up early to beat the storm!" Shinya nodded tiredly.

"Okay, thanks for the tip." He sluggishly walked up the stairs and into his room, then face planted onto his bed.

~

Despite his annoyance, his father did give him a good tip about getting up early. By the time he was walking down the road it had begun to lightly rain with a forecast of harsher weather incoming around the time he would normally be making his daily trek to school.

He tiredly gripped his black umbrella and made sure to tread carefully on the slick sidewalk, all the while avoiding the puddles near the road else he'd be soaked.

He was surprised to see the gate to the school already open, but he was even more shocked to see none other than Kyo leaning against the wall of the school; his backpack was balanced on top of his head to shield himself from the droplets and his ever present green notebook was in his hands along with a eraser-less pencil.

"Shinya, you're here early." Kyo remarked casually whilst scribbling in his notebook, his eyes flicked up for a moment to meet Shinya's. The taller boy noted that he didn't do this for anyone but him.

"Yeah, I heard it was gonna get bad today." He gestured to the falling drops of water and moved to shield both of them from the rain. Due to the width of the umbrella, Shinya had to stand shoulder to shoulder with the shorter student.

Kyo didn't let anyone touch him. He snapped at anyone who would even make a move to tap him on the shoulder, but Shinya noted that the shorter boy merely kept writing.

Shinya watched as Kyo would hastily scribble something down and then scratch it out if he didn't find it satisfactory or would mark a line through a word and then amend it with the corrections written above.

The taller boy peered shamelessly at his friend's notebook and noted once again that this was something only he was permitted to do.

He realized all of these things in the rain whilst standing beside the one boy who had made him feel so many emotions.

And he realized that the one thing that outlasted these emotions was love.

He loved the Kyo standing beside him in the rain with scars on his hands that Shinya never noticed, he loved the Kyo sitting in the book room completely immersed in his own little world, and he loved the Kyo who never took disrespect from anyone no matter how big they are.

He loved Kyo.

Yet, he felt this love as a he would feel a punch to the face. Because why would someone like Kyo ever like Shinya?

The love that had spurned Toshiya was burning Shinya from the inside, as gravity pulled him back to Earth.

'Kyo likes girls.'

'Kyo can live without you, Daisuke and Toshimasa can't live without each other, but Kyo can be just fine without you. He has been fine without you.'

'Besides, the pain of rejection will be so much more painful than death, right? You can't live in the shadow of this love either. One day you'll spill your guts and he'll reject you, hate you, be disgusted. So why not preserve this feeling before you get hurt again?'

'You've been hurt so much, you deserve some peace from this world.'

Shinya shut his eyes and tried to control his racing thoughts, he felt bile rise at the back of his throat but fought to keep it down.

"You okay?" Kyo peered up at him with slight concern, Shinya nodded stiffly, letting Kyo's voice guide him back from the darkness in his head.

"Uh yeah, just a headache." He gritted out through clenched teeth.


	13. Special Chapter: New Best Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How Toshiya and Die's friendship came to be!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for your encouraging words! You all are so awesome!

Toshimasa poked at his rice and eggs in the tiny bowl placed before him by his mother. He swallowed nervously and tried not to make his fiddling with the child fork too obvious as his mother would surely scold him for playing with his food.

"Toshimasa? Eat your breakfast before it gets cold." His mother chastised him gently whilst packing his bento and snack in a bright blue lunch pail.

"I'm not hungry." He whimpered and pushed the bowl away from him. His mother sighed and came to sit next to him at the table.

"Does it feel like little butterflies are fluttering in your tummy?" She poked his tiny belly with an amused smile.

"Is that what's going on? Can they get out?" He looked down at his stomach, wondering when the butterflies got into his digestive track.

"Well, you just have to feed them and they'll go away." She chuckled and pushed the bowl in front of her young son again.

"Really? And then they'll go away?" His mother tucked a long strand of black hair behind her ear and nodded, a bright smile assured Toshimasa that she was telling the truth. With no other assurance beside her smile and words, he began hurriedly eating his food in order to get rid of the fluttering in his stomach.

"If I eat all of my food, do I have to go to kindergarten?" She laughed and shook her head.

"Don't worry, you'll make tons of friends!" Toshimasa wasn't so sure of this, but his mother hadn't been wrong before.

"...okay." He nodded half-heartedly and resigned himself to his fate of going to kindergarten.

"Come on, Totchi! We don't wanna be late!" His mother ruffled his hair and handed him his lunch pail. Toshimasa gratefully took it and latched onto his mother's soft hand, the butterflies had yet to fly away though. In fact, it seemed that the fluttering of their wings was just becoming more intense in Toshimasa's belly.

"Watch your step," his mother chimed as they walked down the apartment stairs and into the tiny parking lot below. Toshimasa wasn't exactly too fond of his new home; it was sometimes too loud and trash littered the stairs and parking lot. Though, he liked his new home more than the one he and his parents shared in Nagano. The constant yelling scared him and he didn't like his father too much and it was quite evident the feeling was mutual.

"Totchi, don't fall!" His mother quickly moved her arm in order to keep her son from falling on the ground as he tripped over a crack in the sidewalk due to his daydreaming.

"Sorry! Sorry!" He whimpered, expecting either a heavy handed slap or a scathing insult. None of that came, however, as his mother simply righted him and made sure he wasn't hurt.

"Are you okay?" She asked him gently, fully knowing of how her former husband had treated her son before. Toshimasa nodded shyly, still afraid of some sort of a looming punishment.

"Watch where you're going, alright Totchi? I don't want you to get hurt." Her young son latched on tighter to her and nodded.

The walk to the kindergarten wasn't long at all, it was only a couple of blocks away from Toshimasa's apartment building..

Flowers and smiling suns were painted on the small building, Toshimasa still wasn't completely convinced that this was a place he was going to feel comfortable at though. His mother ushered him into the building and after talking to the smiling lady at the front desk, they were directed to the 'Tsubaki' Classroom.

"Okay Totchi, I need you to be good for your teachers, alright? I'll come and get you when I get off of work." His mother leaned down and gave him a kiss on the cheek in farewell. Totchi nodded and walked to the entrance of the Tsubaki Class.

"Welcome," the teacher, a middle aged woman with a bun on her head greeted him and gently took Toshimasa's lunch pail and backpack and put them into a cubby by the door. Once his stuff was in the cubby, she took his tiny hand into her's and situated the young boy at a table.

"Okay, boys and girls, it's time to color!" The teacher clapped her hands together and passed out buckets with crayons to each tiny table composed of four children. Her assistant also passed out a small stack of papers to each group and both women stood back to monitor their students.

"Hey gimme your crayon!" One boy demanded, pointing a chubby finger to the blue crayon Toshimasa had grabbed and began coloring with.

"No, I got it first." Toshimasa refused, clutching the crayon of his favorite color to his chest protectively.

"Teacher!" The boy screeched, "he won't share!"

"Hara-kun, you have to share the crayons." She scolded, prying the crayon from Toshimasa's fist and handing it over to the whiny boy.

"But I was using it first!" The young child protested, annoyed but not overly upset by the teacher's actions.

"THAT WAS HIS!" Another, more vehement voice chimed in from the table next to Toshimasa's.

"Daisuke, what did I tell you about inside voices?" The teacher's assistant quickly admonished.

"I don't care, his crayon!" He pointed an accusing finger to the other boy, his young face set in a childish glare.

"He'll give it back when he's done, okay you two?" The teacher assured, Toshimasa just nodded but Daisuke wasn't having it.

"CRAYON!" He wailed, grabbing handfuls of his own group's crayons and tossing them over to the boy who had taken temporary ownership of Toshimasa's favorite crayon.

"CRAYON! CRAYON!" He chanted while throwing, becoming amused by this, Toshimasa also started grabbing crayons from the bucket and tossing them at the other boy.

"CRAYON!" He screeched just as loud. However, after one toss, his hands were grabbed by the teacher's assistant while the teacher grabbed Daisuke's.

"You two need to stop this right now!" The teacher reprimanded, her voice stern and face set in a severe scowl.

"You have stupid hair!" Daisuke bit back, flinching when the teacher grabbed his earlobe and twisted it none too gently.

"ow!" He yelled, Toshimasa's eyes went wide and he started to struggle out of the teacher's assistant's grip.

"No no no no!" Toshimasa whimpered, scared of being hit or pinched. The teacher and her assistant shared a look between each other, the assistant let go of Toshimasa's hands and took a step back.

"Alright, no more coloring for you two." The teacher said and gestured for them to get up.

"Both of you are going to the time-out table and there will be no recess." Both Toshimasa and Daisuke nodded sullenly and took their seats at the time out table, which was just a regular table but pushed back in the far corner of the room and isolated from the other children.

"What's your name?" Daisuke stuck his pudgy hand out with a crooked grin that was missing his front teeth.

"Toshimasa..." The other boy whimpered quietly.

"Huh? Toshiya?" Toshimasa was too nervous to shake his head or correct him.

For the rest of his time in Kindergarten, Toshimasa had been called 'Toshiya' by Daisuke so much that the other children had quickly followed suit. It wasn't until they started at the same elementary school that Daisuke realized his mistake, much to Toshimasa's teasing and Daisuke's own embarrassment.

By then, they had become such steadfast best friends that it didn't matter. In fact, Toshimasa had come up with his own nickname for Daisuke; Die.

~

"Ha, Toshiya doesn't have a daaaad," The two boys pushing Toshimasa between them laughed obnoxiously. Singing their malignant song at the top of their lungs while Toshiya was trying to break free from them without starting a fight.

"Why'd he leave huh?" One of the boys asked, a smirk plastered on his face.

"Dunno," Toshimasa answered dully, wondering when they would get bored and leave him be.

"Nah, I bet it was his mom! Have you seen her?" The other barked, unknowingly incurring the wrath of Toshimasa. Without even thinking, Toshimasa swung his fist and smirked when it landed on the bully's nose.

"Hey!" The unharmed bully yelled, stepping back and turning on his heel. Meanwhile, Toshimasa rained down his wrath on the bully in the form of closed fists. Angry tears rushed down his face, dripping down his cheeks and forming into small puddles on the pavement.

He didn't care if they teased him about not having a father. From what he remembered of the man, he knew he hated him. The yelling, the hitting. He remembered everything besides his own father's face. He didn't want to remember.

His mother, on the other hand, was off-limits to teasing of any sorts. She had risked her life to save him, to save him from his own father who Toshimasa was sure would end up killing them if they had stayed in Nagano.

His hands found their way to the other boy's throat, his choked screaming falling on deaf ears because Toshimasa was stuck remembering.

Remembering a strong hand holding him below the water in the bathtub, deaf to his kicking and his struggle to breath. Remembering that same hand slamming his toddler body against the wall because he cried too much. He remembered it all in that moment.

"Hey! Stop Toshiya!" A voice broke through his murderous haze, Toshimasa turned around and swung, his mind completely gone and his face set in an expression that didn't belong on a ten year old.

"Ow!" Daisuke stumbled back, clutching his red cheek between his hands.

"You jerk!" He muttered and latched himself back onto his best friend in his pitiful version of a bear hug, struggling to keep Toshiya's arms at his sides and not around anyone's throats.

"There they are!" The boy who had run away appeared again, this time with a teacher who immediately grabbed Toshiya by his arms and wrestled him into the principal's office while the other three boys trailed behind him (Toshiya's target had to rely on help from both Die and his friend).

Finally Toshiya snapped out of his haze and looked between his former target and Daisuke with a horrified expression.

"I'm going to let go, Understood?" The teacher said slowly and lowered Toshiya into a plastic chair. Without missing a beat, Daisuke sat beside him and shot his conflicted friend a smile. All Toshiya could see was the bruising cheek Die was sporting.

"I did that?" He whispered, shifting his eyes to the floor.

"This?" Die pointed to the bruise with a nonchalant grin.

"You hit like a girl, Toshiya." He deadpanned, making his friend crack a small grin that was quickly wiped away when his name was called by the stern looking principal.

~

After the meeting with the principal, his mother had come to pick him up. Her normally serene face was beet red and she could barely speak, instead electing to point to her son and beckon him forward. Die sent him an assuring look, Toshiya tried to return it but without any luck.

The walk back home was eerily quiet, neither Hara speaking. His mother being too angry and Toshimasa unsure of what to say.

She finally unleashed her pent up anger when the door to their tiny apartment shut.

"What were you thinking Hara Toshimasa?" She blew up, turning to her son with a dark expression.

"They made fun of you!" Toshimasa yelled back, furious at the whole situation.

"Then let them! You could've seriously hurt that young boy!" She scolded, her son shook his head.

"He deserved it mom!" He raged, wishing she wouldn't yell. He always hated yelling.

"If they press charges on you, they could take you away from me!" She yelled, an odd desperation overcoming her voice. Toshimasa stopped, opening and closing his mouth without saying anything, he couldn't think of anything to say to this.

"I...Uh..." She shook her head.

"Just go to your room." His mother sighed, Toshimasa just nodded and went to his room, slamming the door as he did so.

~

"How'd I know you would be here?" Toshiya jumped slightly when he heard Daisuke's voice right beside him.

"What are you doing here?" The boy sitting on the swing said, unable to bring himself to look at his hurt friend.

"Bored." Die simply said and sat down on the swing beside his friend's.

"In the middle of the night?" Toshiya asked, kicking the dirt with his foot.

"Yep. What about you?" Toshiya just shrugged.

"Same thing...And my mom is mad at me. She said that if they press charges, I can go away somewhere from my mom." Die nodded sagely.

"Do you want to?" Toshiya cocked an eyebrow in question.

"Want to what?" Die looked at him for a moment before answering.

"Go away from your mom?" Toshiya shook his head vigorously.

"No way, she saved me from my dad." Die cocked his head but didn't comment on that.

"You beat that kid up pretty bad." Toshiya nodded miserably.

"I didn't mean to!" He cried out, afraid that his best friend was going to think he was a monster or crazy.

"I know, I would beat him up too." Die assured.

"Thanks..." Toshiya said, relieved.

"What about...Like, if we ran away until everyone forgot about it?" He sent a curious glance to Daisuke, the shorter boy was simply staring at him intently. The white cotton taped to Daisuke's cheek made the taller boy ache with unhappiness.

"How long do you think it'll take?" Toshiya asked, twisting a piece of short black hair between his thumb and forefinger.

"Two weeks, tops?" Two weeks didn't sound so bad, especially with his best friend.

"Okay. If they press charges then let's runaway." Die stuck out his hand.

"Promise?" Toshiya shyly shook it.

"Promise!" With that, both boys smiled at each other and went their own ways back home. Toshiya slipped back into his room and warmed his chilled body with the covers on his bed.

He was slightly hoping that the other boy would press charges on him, so that he and Die could run away to another place where he wouldn't have to worry about bullies or his dad.

He wondered what kind of place that would be. Maybe Tokyo? He thought, since Tokyo was such a huge place, it would be easy to get lost. Maybe those retched memories would get lost as well between the tall buildings and streets.

~

Toshimasa had spent the school day sitting in his room, his activities were mostly composed of staring at the wall or sleeping. He was currently suspended from school and his mother had forbade him from watching tv or reading comic books. Normally, Toshimasa would've snuck his manga out of her room or chanced watching tv, but after she threatened with a month long punishment he quickly put the thought out of his head.

"Toshimasa, I'm home." He perked up and bounded into the living room to greet his mother. Although tired, she didn't look too angry at her son anymore, in fact she looked somewhat pleased.

"How'd it go at school?" He asked timidly.

"As good as I could hope for," she answered somewhat dryly. Toshimasa cocked his head, wondering if this meant he didn't have to run away.

"The other boy's parents aren't pressing charges but you are being moved to another class." She sat at the table and beckoned her son to join her.

"You're moving to classroom 3-E." She said, looking a bit put out since Toshimasa had originally been in class 3-B which was the high achievers class.

"Your principal said that if you work hard enough you can probably move back to 3-B." His mother said, a hopeful glint in her eyes. Toshimasa, however, was trying very hard to keep from shouting out in happiness. Daisuke was in class 3-E, so that meant they could hang a lot more than when Toshimasa was in the 'smart kids' class. Needless to say, he had no intention of moving back to 3-B anytime soon.


	14. Call of the Void

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shinya seeks out a way to end his internal suffering, but is saved by a yokai.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was kind of a bummer to write, but at least we're getting closer to my favorite chapter <3
> 
> This one is kinda short, but the next one is somewhat longer along with some fluff~

  
"Terachi-kun? Terachi-kun!" The teacher snapping his fingers in front of Shinya's face brought the teen out of his daze.

"U-uh yes teacher?" The slight teen piped up, trying to focus on the man standing before him.

"I looked over your work from the past week and I'm really disappointed." This brought the attention of both Toshiya and Daisuke, who were still not talking to each other, but weren't actively arguing either.

"A lot of it hasn't been finished, so I'll need you to go to Saturday class tomorrow and get it done before the grading period ends." Shinya nodded sullenly, ignoring both of his friends' sympathetic gazes.

"You too, Nishimura-kun, though I don't expect you to go." The teacher rolled his eyes and pushed up his glasses, Shinya scowled and looked down to the blank assignment on his desk. He hadn't done a single thing since that morning and now he had to go to Saturday school in order to make up for the lost work. He sighed in annoyance, he couldn't even function right because of Kyo.

"Yes teacher," Shinya sighed while Kyo remained silent, seemingly ignoring the older man per usual.

"See you two tomorrow." The teacher pointedly tapped his finger on Shinya's desk and nodded to him with a stern expression. All Shinya could manage to do was nod and duck his head in embarrassment.

~

"Wow, Saturday classes? That sucks dude." Toshiya whistled as they walked home together under Shinya's black umbrella, Die was absent from their walk per usual as of recently.

"Yeah, it does," Shinya groaned, not looking forward to telling his dad about this. However, it seemed that he didn't have to as the older Terachi was waiting for his son at the gate. Toshiya patted his friend's shoulder sympathetically and waved to Mr. Terachi.

"See ya on Monday," Shinya nodded stonily and prepared himself for the verbal lashing his father was sure to give him.

"In the house. Now." His son said nothing and did as he was told, deciding to wait in the hallway.

"Why haven't you been doing your homework?!" Shinya's father shouted once the door had closed after him.

"I just-I just forgot to turn it in." Shinya swallowed, absolutely hating being shouted at.

"Forgot to turn it in?! You must think I'm an idiot!" Shinya shook his head, not trusting himself to speak.

"Is Andou taking your homework? Or is it Hara?"

"No! I just really forgot to turn it in!" The teenager said, angry that his father dragged his friends into their argument.

"Don't you dare yell at your father! What would your mother say?!"

"She's not here so who cares!" Shinya stumbled back against the wall as the slap surprised him, he clutched at his stinging cheek with humiliation and looked up at his father who seemed on the verge of hitting him again.

"Go upstairs!" His father barked at him and pointed a trembling finger at the staircase, Shinya needn't be told twice as he booked it up the stairs and slammed his door.

~

The next morning Shinya rose from his bed as the dreary morning light streaked through his window and into his room. He rubbed at his eyes, neither tired nor energetic, as he spent the whole night crying. Whether it was from the argument with his father or his hopeless feelings for Kyo, he wasn't quite sure what made him feel such despair. He didn't want to live with such painful sadness; it had been lying dormant inside of him for so many years and now he knew that Kyo was just the last nail in his coffin.

He sighed and began dressing himself for school, biding his time as he was sure today was the day.

Quietly, he crept down the stairs with his backpack so as to not wake his father and be met with another verbal attack. He made it out of the house without a sound and began his trek to the school, not bothering to slow his steps as no one was waiting to walk with him today.

Finally he made it to school and seated himself at the desk furthest in the back with only another desk beside it, just in case Kyo decided to go today. Shinya knew that Kyo would probably stay in bed than go to school on a Saturday, and it made him more than a little relieved. He didn't know if seeing Kyo's face would change his mind or force him off the edge.

Either way he was content, but deep down he felt a little disappointed.

"Here's your work Terachi-kun," the teacher slapped down several papers on his desk with a disapproving scowl.

"I thought you being here would motivate Nishimura, but it seems he's rubbing off more on you than the other way around." Shinya returned the scowl with his own disgusted one.

"I'm here," a disinterested voice sighed, both men looked up and saw Kyo leaning against the door frame with an equally as disinterested smirk. The teacher tsked and gestured for him to sit down, which the other boy did but right next to Shinya.

Shinya felt a smile bubble forth from his lips, but the relief was soon gone and replaced with doubt.

Couldn't he be happy just seeing that face everyday?

But what if Kyo fell in love with someone other than Shinya? He wouldn't be able to handle that pain. He wasn't strong like Toshiya.

"Nice of you to bless us with your presence," the teacher snarled and thrusted Kyo's papers into his hands none too gently. Kyo smirked again and simply left the dropped papers onto his desk and elected to pull out his green notebook and began aimlessly doodling.

Shinya began working on the papers more so as a distraction than any desire to get them done, he eventually settled on watching Kyo doodle the bloody and unfortunate end of their teacher.

"That a shark?" Shinya piped up after seeing Kyo draw a huge fish with sharp teeth snapping up the middle aged teacher sitting at his own desk.

"Nope, it's a piranha. I saw a picture of it in a book once, it looks pretty cool." He laughed and was promptly shushed by the subject of his violent doodles.

"Doing anything after this?" Kyo asked, completely ignoring the pointed 'shush' from the front of the classroom. Shinya remained quiet for a moment and nodded, trying his hardest to look sheepish.

"I got grounded so I have to go home right after," it wasn't a lie, he reasoned.

"That sucks, maybe next time then." Kyo grinned and went back to his drawings, totally unaware that his statement broke Shinya's heart.

"Yeah, maybe next time..." He smiled, making sure that his lips didn't fall too quickly.

After another hour of meaningless work, both Kyo and Shinya were permitted to leave and go home. Completely bored out of his mind, Kyo hurriedly packed up his stuff and bolted for the door after biding Shinya a quick goodbye.

Shinya wished with all of his might to keep Kyo there with him, but he knew that the other boy would just get in the way of his plan. Besides, in the end Kyo would be better off without someone like him.

"He doesn't need someone...disgusting like me around him." Shinya whispered to himself and ripped out a piece of paper out of his notebook and began hastily writing all of his thoughts and emotions onto it before erasing it all and simply writing 'I'm sorry I'm not strong, so very sorry.'

He packed up his things and did not notice Kyo's green notebook laying under a desk, seemingly kicked out of the walkway by another student. Instead, he focused all of his strength in hoisting his bag over his shoulder and leaving the classroom for the roof.

Once he reached the roof, he dropped his things except for the note and tried his best not to shake too badly as he walked to the fence encircling the perimeter of the roof that kept students from doing what Shinya intended to do.

"Don't freak out now, it's not like you're going alone." He choked out and calmed himself, feeling comfort from that very sentence.

Shinya methodically took off his shoes and put the letter inside one of them, making sure that one end of it poked out and wasn't hidden. Taking a deep and sobering breath, he started to climb up the fence and swung his legs over the edge, letting himself sit on it for a just moment.

"I'm really gonna do this..." He closed his eyes and tried not to freak out, but his fear got the best of him. He opened his eyes and looked down, knowing that if he slipped or let go, there was no going back. Panic set over him and his palms began to sweat as the realization and gravity of what he was going to do washed over him.

"What the fuck!" An enraged and shocked voice shouted out, making Shinya jerk with surprise and almost lose his grip. He tried to turn around but something latching onto the back of his shirt sent him careening backwards and onto the person who had shouted.

Tears filled his eyes as he caught sight of the familiar green notebook laying just a few feet away from him.


	15. A Guest in the Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kyo and Shinya centric chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for reading! This chapter isn't proof-read so if there's any mistakes please forgive me!

"What the fuck are you doing!" Kyo shouted, locking his short legs onto his taller friend's stomach like a vice while grabbing his arms in order to keep him from hurting himself or climbing the fence again.

"You want to fucking kill yourself! Are you crazy!?" Shinya coughed and slapped at Kyo's hands feebly, trying to get him to loosen his grip on his stomach.

"Kyo let go," he wheezed.

"Fuck no! So you can try and jump again? I'm not stupid!" The shorter boy growled and squeezed harder, making Shinya groan in pain.

"I promise I'm not gonna jump! You're gonna end up killing me instead!" Kyo stopped his vice grip and reluctantly unwound his legs from his friend and let go of his hands cautiously.

"Go into the stairway and stay there while I get your shoes. If I even see you make a move towards the fence, I'm really gonna end up killing you." Shinya nodded and got up, brushing dirt off of himself and limping to the door that led into the staircase. Meanwhile Kyo grabbed Shinya's shoes and his green notebook and brought them to Shinya, but before the taller boy could grab the note, Kyo had snatched it out of his shoes and opened it.

"Idiot! Don't say sorry for being weak! Just get stronger!" Those words may have been harsh, but Kyo's expression was soft and vulnerable. He ripped up the letter and pocketed the scraps, taking care to keep every single shred.

"You don't need it...And besides," He looked down at his shoes and latched onto the taller boy's soft hand, "you can't die because you're my first friend..."

A wealth of emotions washed over Shinya in that moment; emotions ranging from self-loathing, infatuation, love, and despair overcame him and he burst into angry tears. The last thing he ever wanted to do was hurt Kyo.

He ripped his hand away and punched Kyo's shoulder, not enough to hurt nor enough to deter Kyo from grasping onto the hand once again and leading him down the stairs and to the boy's bathroom in order to clean him up.

Unbeknownst to the both of them, they were being watched by two pairs of malevolent eyes.

Inside the bathroom, Kyo locked the door and wet a paper towel to wipe his friend's face with. Shinya let him, eyes never leaving the floor because he was afraid of what he may confess to if he looked at his affection in the eyes.

"You scared me so much you dumb idiot." Kyo remarked, his tone sagged in relief despite those spiked words.

"I'm sorry." Kyo said nothing but nodded and gently wiped his face once more.

After cleaning Shinya up, Kyo walked his friend home and sent him off with a stern farewell.

"Don't do anything stupid, I'll stop by later on tonight." He said, turning his back so that he could walk in the direction of his own home.

"But, I'm grounded!" Shinya called after him, he could hear Kyo chuckle which confused him.

"So? S'not like your dad's gonna know I dropped by. Just keep your window open." He waved his hand dismissively and disappeared down the street leaving an even more confused Shinya at his gate.

Shinya sighed and stepped into his house, not really knowing what to expect from his father after yesterday's tirade.

He somewhat expected his father waiting for him in the hallway, but wasn't really anticipating the sorrowful expression nor the stiff hug.

"I'm sorry Shinya, I shouldn't have hit you yesterday." His father slowly detached himself and looked as if he wanted to say more but couldn't bring himself too.

"It's okay, I messed up." Was all he could think of to reply back, his father just shook his head and apologized once more, then Shinya retreated to his room. All he really wanted to do was sleep.

~

'Tap tap tap'

Shinya blearily opened his eyes and nearly fell out of bed when he saw a dark figure silhouetted against his bedroom window.

'tap tap tap'

He scrambled out of his bed but managed to get his foot caught in the blankets that had pooled around him, making him flop to the floor in a heap. He heard a muffled cackle at his misfortune and was struck with confusion.

"Kyo?" He mumbled sleepily, wondering why his friend had come to visit so late, nevermind how he was now tapping at his window.

"Open the window." He heard the shorter teen whisper, without any hesitation Shinya did as he was ordered and helped a chilled Kyo into his bedroom.

"Why are you here?" He asked, head tilted to the side in question. Kyo just laughed and wrapped himself up in Shinya's blanket before seating himself on his friend's bed, back firmly against the wall.

"I said I was gonna come by didn't I?" Oh yeah, Shinya had thought he meant 'come by' as in knock on the door. Yet, that would be very uncharacteristic of him to do so.

"...Right." Kyo smiled and he could see his friend starting to upturn his lips as well.

Shinya fell harder for him even more, if that was possible.

"I'm cold, come here." The comfy teen beckoned Shinya to come over and join him under the blanket; it was big enough to wrap over both of their shoulders, but just small enough that they had to press their shoulders together in order to keep it covering them so warmly.

Shinya's heart was beating so loudly, he wondered how he hadn't had a heart attack yet.

"Is it too hot? You're sweating." Kyo helpfully pointed out, knocking their shoulders together teasingly.

"No-no, just um," the stuttering teen snapped his mouth shut and looked down at his clasping and unclasping hands, Kyo noticed and cocked his head inquisitively.

"Just what?" He asked innocently, making his friend blush.

"I've never been so close with someone before." Kyo simply stared before chuckling.

"And you think I have?" Shinya felt comforted by his crush's trembling shoulders against his, trying valiantly to not burst out in good-natured laughter.

"Hey, why'd you move? It's been bugging me for a while, you don't have to tell me though." Kyo asked abruptly, peering up at Shinya with an unreadable expression.

"Um, it's kinda embarrassing..." The taller boy trailed off, Kyo cast his eyes down in disappointment which spurred his friend on.

"I, uh, was getting bullied a lot...And my dad got offered a job here in Kyoto so I guess me being bullied wasn't really the reason, but I think it played a huge part since I was really depressed back there and-" He rambled, fingers playing with the frayed edge of his blanket, terrified to look at the other inhabitant of the blanket.

"Shinya." He stopped rambling immediately and felt fingers at his cheeks positioning his face to look at their owner. Shinya hated to admit it, but those fingers burned his face and made him a hundred times more nervous.

"You know I'm the last person to judge you. Why did they bully you?" This was the exact question the taller teen was terrified of. What if Kyo took back his friendship because of his answer? Just the possibility of it made him want to die.

"I-I can't tell you...You won't be my friend after." Kyo huffed and shook his head.

"Why would I give up my only friend over something that happened last year? I'm a lot more open minded than you think, just trust me dammit." Shinya swallowed and nodded.

"They-They thought I was...Ga-gay." Shinya stopped breathing for a second and slammed his eyes shut, petrified of the look of disgust he expected to be on that pale face.

"Oh, are you?" The question was purely nonchalant and casual, as if Kyo was asking what the weather was going to be like tomorrow.

"No, of course not!" He didn't want to lie to Kyo, but he knew nothing good would come out of confessing to him right now.

"There's nothing to freak out about then." The shorter teen shrugged and let his friend relax against him.

"Well, yeah I guess you're right." Shinya conceded, his heart feeling way lighter than it did a minute ago.

"I'm always right." Kyo smirked.

"By the way..." Shinya started off, staring at the ceiling for a long while.

"How did you know I was on the roof?" He finished, wincing at the end of his own question. Talking about it like this....Almost made it seem too real for Shinya.

"I realized there was a hole in my bag so I went back to the classroom to see if I dropped anything and I saw you go up the stairs. I thought that was weird since you said something about going home, so after I grabbed my notebook I followed you up." He recounted, his face set into a scowl.

"Sorry," Shinya said sheepishly. Kyo gently rapped his knuckles on Shinya's head, making sure to not hurt him.

"Don't sorry me, just don't do it ever again." Shinya nodded without hesitation.

~

"Shinya? Why is your door locked?" The sound of the knob turning back and forth woke Shinya from his sleep, it took him a moment to fully understand why he was laying on his crush's chest.

"Shinya!" Shit.

"Just getting up dad!" Shinya quickly exclaimed and slipped out of Kyo's arms, trying hard to fight his growing blush.

"Kyo wake up!" He whisper-yelled while gingerly shaking his friend to wakefulness.

"Huh?" The taller teen had to fight the urge to internally scream since Kyo's bed head and sleepy expression was making him look far hotter than Shinya thought possible.

"You have to hide in the closet, my dad's gonna come in!" Kyo simply shot up and practically threw himself into the closet and quietly shut the door.

After Kyo was safely enclosed in the closet, Shinya unlocked the bedroom door and opened it just a crack so his father wouldn't be able to see the other boy's shoes on the window sill.

"Yes, dad?" Shinya asked, trying to ignore his father's questioning expression.

"Uh, I got called into work so I might be gone until evening." Shinya tried to look disappointed, but he could tell from his father's suddenly scandalized face that he failed badly.

"Aw man, on a Sunday?" Shinya muttered, his dad just shrugged and shook his head.

"Anyway, breakfast is in the oven. Just turn it on okay?" His son nodded and hugged his father goodbye, quickly shutting the door and finding a smug Kyo sitting cross-legged on his bed.

"Ah," he wasn't really prepared to see Kyo in that state; sleepiness still in his eyes and his t-shirt and pants somehow vacating his body sometime in the night. All Shinya could do was swallow the knot that had made itself known in his throat.

"Good thing he didn't stay too long, your closet is so cramped. You need to clean it." Kyo mumbled, rubbing the palm of hand against his eye.

"Uh r-right. I'll get on that uh soon." The owner of the room said lamely, unsure of what to do with himself since he was sure he'd explode if he sat on the bed with Kyo, who was mostly devoid of his clothing besides a pair of grey boxers.

"You know, I'm going to go get dressed!" Shinya screeched as he realized he was wearing just a wife-beater and his sanrio pajama shorts.

"Okay, I'm going to eat your breakfast." TO be honest, Shinya didn't even mind. He was far too nervous to eat anyway.


	16. A Day Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shinya and friends spend the day together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long time no see guys! Sorry for the long wait ;-;

  
After Shinya finished up his shower, he marched down the stairs and to the kitchen, smiling brightly when he saw two plates of eggs and toast. The portion of eggs were smaller than he was used to, but he guessed it was half of what his father had made.

"Woah, you straightened your hair?" Shinya flushed and quickly sat down at the table, somewhat thankful that Kyo had dressed himself in his clothes from the night before.

"Uh yeah, I'm pretty sure Die and Toshiya do too." He replied, fighting down his blush and digging into his food as Kyo sat beside him and did the same.

"Hm, I wanna try it." The shorter teenager gestured to the mop of brown hair sitting on his head, Shinya nearly dropped his chopsticks at the suggestion.

"Let's do it after I clean up breakfast. Did you see Die's hair during the break, by the way?" Kyo snorted and nodded.

"The red right? Hate to admit it, but it suited him pretty good." Shinya couldn't help but notice the envious look Kyo was sporting. He tried to imagine Kyo with bright red, flaming hair but ended up laughing at the thought.

"What? Red hair would look good on me." Kyo muttered, seemingly lacking confidence of this.

"Sure, maybe we should dye it next break?" The taller teen suggested, Kyo shook his head sullenly.

"My grandparents would beat the hell out of me." He said soberly, pushing around his eggs with the end of his chopsticks.

"Is that why...?" Shinya pointedly looked at the back of Kyo's hands, he followed the other teen's gaze and immediately settled his hands below the table and out of sight.

"Dumb to deny it, huh?" He said, voice dripping with acid that Shinya knew wasn't aimed at him.

"It's not like they do it all the time anyway..." Kyo explained, growing quiet when he noticed Shinya didn't look too convinced.

"Fine," he hissed and offered his more scarred hand to Shinya so he could see it better. Gingerly, Shinya reached over and took Kyo's smaller hand into his.

The white scars were crisscrossed into his skin, as if they were inflicted with a tiny blade. The taller teen's stomach dropped when he noticed some seemed more recent than others.

"My grandfather is really traditional, you know? After the fight, he made more on my other hand. He wasn't mad that I got into the fight, just that he thought I had lost." Shinya rubbed his thumb over the scars, a deep feeling of sadness welling up inside of him.

"Then that day you came back, your head bandage-" He started off but was cut off by Kyo.

"I wrapped it myself, yeah. I guess that's why it looked kinda dumb and half-assed." Kyo mumbled, turning his face away from Shinya and taking his hand back.

"If you ever get hurt, just come to me okay?" Shinya half begged, Kyo squirmed but nodded anyway.

"I uh...okay." The shorter of the two teens muttered, his face flustered for once instead of Shinya.

"Well, I"m done if you are." Kyo nodded and let his friend take their plates to the kitchen and watched as Shinya quickly washed them and put the dishes on the drying rack.

After he finished, both Kyo and Shinya wordlessly went back upstairs to Shinya's room where Kyo sat cross legged on the floor and Shinya brought out his hair straightener.

"Okay, it'll take a second for it to heat up again," Shinya explained and sat behind Kyo, quickly taking this opportunity to run his hands through the straight but slightly curled locks.

So soft, he thought inwardly and was thankful Kyo couldn't see his face.

"It just beeped." Kyo commented, jostling Shinya out of his ill timed daydream.

"Yeah, I know." He coughed and began straightening Kyo's hair. Kyo hummed at the sensation of the hot iron and thin, nimble fingers carding through his hair.

"Your hair is mostly straight, so I just have a little bit left." The taller teen murmured.

"You're done that quickly?" Shinya shrugged.

"You don't have that much hair to begin with," He half teased and patted Kyo's back to let him know he was finished.

"Mirror?" Shinya pointed to the door with a chuckle.

"It's in the bathroom," Kyo nodded and padded out of the bedroom and to the bathroom.

"How is it?" Shinya asked when Kyo came back.

"Long," the smaller teen mumbled, fingering a strand of hair that fell over his ear.

"It looks good," Shinya complimented, trying to make the words sound as if he were complimenting his own work instead of Kyo all together.

Eventually, both boys devolved into awkward silence. Shinya trying valiantly to think of something to do while Kyo stared at him as if he could look through the taller boy.

Luckily, loud thumping noises from the genkan startled them out of their thoughts. Kyo jumped back into the closet and Shinya cautiously made his way down the stairs and to the mudroom.

"You're alive!" Toshiya cried out, making Shinya's eyes widen at the thought of Toshiya somehow knowing about what he attempted yesterday.

"I thought your dad was gonna kill you for sure!" He wrapped his arms around Shinya and nearly took him down to the ground.

"Let the guy breathe." Die laughed, standing awkwardly to the side.

"Die!" Shinya exclaimed in surprise, having not seen his friend in what felt like forever.

"He decided he needed guy time," Toshiya smirked and let go of his best friend. Die looked annoyed at that, but for the sake of peace he remained silent.

"Anyway, we were thinking about going bowling and," Toshiya put a hand up to stop any protest from his friend, "it doesn't matter if you're grounded. I'll just tell your dad I kidnapped you."

"We kidnapped you," Die corrected, ignoring the glare from Toshiya.

"Uh, okay. Can Kyo come to?" Shinya asked, looking between the two once best friends with a hidden regret. He really wished they would hurry up and make amends, but seeing how they were acting towards it each other it was becoming less and less likely.

"Sure, let's go get him." Shinya shook his head, his cheeks blooming pink for a moment.

"He's kind of...Already here." He admitted. Toshiya had a look of realization on his face; complete with a dropped jaw and wide eyes, while Die just shrugged.

"We might have to stop by his house anyway. He'll probably need clothes." Even though it seemed impossible, Toshiya's expression looked even more surprised.

"Fine by me," Die grinned. Shinya nodded and bounded up the stairs and to his room, amused by the fact that it was empty meaning that Kyo was still in the closet.

"It's only Toshiya and Die." Shinya called out. Kyo poked his head out of the closet with a confused expression.

"Together? Hell has frozen over?" The taller teen just laughed.

"Partially, they're still pretty mad at each other." It must be bad if even Kyo could tell, Shinya thought. Kyo stepped out of the closet completely and fixed his clothes as they had ridden up his body.

"We're going bowling." Shinya declared, Kyo cocked his head. The shorter teen could've sworn he saw a weird glint in his taller friend's eyes.

"Okay, we'll I'm going to go change." Before Shinya could ask him about what he meant, Kyo walked over to the window and threw it open. He reached a hand out and climbed out.

"Uh," Shinya voiced, utterly confused until Kyo climbed back up the tree beside his window with a backpack on his back.

"I stashed my stuff behind your tree. You know, just in case you kicked me out and I was too tired to get it last night." Shinya just nodded at the explanation, watching in amusement as Kyo padded to the bathroom to go change with his duct taped backpack.

"Shinya!" Toshiya whisper-yelled as he ran up the stairs and into the other boy's room. He quietly shut the door and rounded on Shinya with excited questions.

"You and Kyo? Seriously? How did I not see this coming!?" He groaned and latched onto his friend, shaking him gently.

"We're just friends," Shinya quietly explained, Toshiya shook his head.

"Don't buy it." Toshiya replied cheekily.

"If you two aren't together now, it's really a matter of time." The lighter haired boy blushed and shook his head.

"Pretty sure he's straight..." The taller teen scoffed.

"Pretty sure he's not." He threw back, Shinya just looked at him as if he were crazy.

"Shinya seriously, he looks at you like he's actually...alive or something." Toshiya said, a hint of envy quite evident in his voice.

"Yeah right," was all Shinya could bring himself to say. Luckily their conversation was interrupted by Die stomping into the room, a look of deep irritation set on his face.

"Wow you didn't have to lock me in the closet, asshole." Die murmured and was followed by Kyo who had finished changing his clothes.

"Aw Kyo, why'd you have to let him out?" Toshiya laughed.

"Screw you, he's my best friend now." Die grabbed the shortest teen and pulled him to his side, sticking his tongue out at both Shinya and Toshiya.

"And my bowling partner." The former red head insisted, Kyo looked at Shinya as if asking for permission to deck Die for grabbing him. Shinya minutely shook his head and Kyo nodded, letting himself be manhandled by Die.

"Well, let's go!" Toshiya said, ushering the other three boys out of the room.

~

"The fuck." Die muttered, head between his hands and Kyo sitting right next to him looking equally as downcast.

"Suck it losers!" Toshiya shouted, high-fiving a pleased but slightly embarrassed Shinya.

"Who knew Shinya was a bowling prodigy." Kyo murmured, looking at the score forlornly.

Die and Kyo had gotten a good score, and after seeing Toshiya get gutter ball after gutter ball, they were assured that they would win easily. However, Shinya had no trouble getting numerous strikes and carrying his team with little problems. Honestly, it made their win all the more impressive.

"Honestly, I don't even know." Shinya said sheepishly and accepted another one armed hug from a triumphant Toshiya.

"Cough it up," Toshiya turned to the losing team and stuck his hand out, a smirk firmly in place.

Both boys sighed and handed over two five hundred yen notes, the tall teen took the money with another cheeky smirk and a 'thank you very much' before handing Shinya his five hundred yen.

"Come on Shin, let's go get ice cream." Shinya nodded and followed his friend to the concession area of the bowling alley, leaving Kyo and Die on the bench with their measly scorecard.

When they came back, both Die and Kyo's expressions lit up as they saw the other two boys carrying two ice creams each.

"You guys are seriously awesome." Die said, hand held out towards Toshiya so that he could receive his ice cream.

"What are you talking about? These are for me." Toshiya joked, but handed one ice cream over to Die anyway. Shinya wordless gave one to Kyo as well and all four boys sat on the bench and ate their treats; Toshiya and Die joking together with genuine smiles on their faces while Shinya and Kyo silently watched them, laughing accordingly and sending amused grins to each other.

For the first time in a while, Shinya felt completely at ease and happy.


	17. Betrayal of a Bond

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Language/slurs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, didn't have time to proof-read this one. I'm literally uploading this during my college lecture while my teacher's back is turned lolol
> 
> Also, sorry this one is so short ;-;   
> but the next chapter should make up for it ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

The beginning of the week had been absolutely blissful and enjoyably normal for Shinya. Both Die and Toshiya were seemingly comfortable with one another once again and Kyo was the same as usual, except more agreeable when it came to eating lunch together and hanging out after school. However, like most good things, this pleasant atmosphere between the four friends didn't last long.

On Wednesday, the weird looks and whispers had faintly confused Shinya, but he shrugged them off without much of a thought. The next day was when he was finally tipped off to the rumor between him and Kyo, with Die avoiding the two like the plague to add insult to injury.

"Arcade again today?" Toshiya had turned around in his seat and asked the two teenagers behind him and Die.

"Sounds good to me," Shinya replied, turning to Kyo with a hopeful half smile.

"Okay." Kyo simply said, eyes trained on his notebook and his pencil scraping against the paper like usual.

"Die?" Toshiya asked, cocking his head to the side in order to get a better look at his friend.

"Uh, no I'm gonna pass." Die muttered, not bothering to look at Toshiya.

"That's like the second time this week! You never pass up going to the arcade, what's wrong?" The dark haired boy seemed genuinely worried.

"I just don't feel like going." Daisuke grunted, hunching his shoulders and bowing his head in an effort to close himself off to further questioning.

"Whatever, there's something up with you. Matsuri break up with you?" Toshiya pressed on, completely unfazed by his friend's unsociable behavior.

"No, I just don't want to go!" Die turned to snark at Toshiya, but Shinya could see that his expression was that of guilt.

"If he doesn't want to go then let it be, Toshiya." Kyo voiced his admonishment much to the surprise of all three boys. The pestering teenager sent Kyo a wry look but nodded anyway.

"Alright, but I'm gonna find out why you've been avoiding us." He warned and elbowed Die none to gently.

Shinya just went back to his work without a word. He was at least somewhat glad that he wasn't the only one who noticed Die being dismissive to their attempts to invite him out and talk to him. He just didn't want to think that his first friend in Kyoto was going out of his way to avoid them so suddenly.

~

"I wonder what his problem is?!" Toshiya complained, crossing his thin arms against his chest and his face set in an agitated scowl.

"Stressed out maybe?" Shinya offered, trying to ignore the way Kyo kept bumping his arm against his as they walked to the arcade.

"No way, you know he never says no to the arcade!" The tallest of the three friends whined.

"Why do you care so much?" Kyo asked bluntly, Toshiya turned to him so sharply that Shinya was afraid that he was going to try and start a fight with Kyo.

"He's my friend, you'd be just as confused and pissed if Shinya stopped hanging out with you for no reason." Kyo simply nodded, Toshiya's reasoning seemingly enough to satisfy his curiosity.

"Let's just give him some time, okay?" The lighter haired teenager voiced, unsure and hoping that Die would return to normal soon.

"Yeah, okay." Toshiya managed a weak smile and the three boys continued their trek to the arcade.

~

Despite Shinya's assurance, Daisuke's avoidance of the three boys had become somehow worse. Now to the point where Die wouldn't even stay for lunch, instead he'd run out of the classroom as soon as the bell rung.

However, it wasn't just him. The whole class simply refused to acknowledge Shinya and Kyo's existence, which Kyo seemed to not notice but it was starting to freak Shinya out.

"What are you looking at?!" Toshiya snapped at a group of boys who were sending Shinya and Kyo lingering and questioning looks, which bothered Shinya more than the class-wide silent treatment.

"The two homos over there!" The bravest of the group pointed to Toshiya's friends. Shinya's blood ran cold and his face turned pale, Kyo on the other hand simply ignored them.

"Homos?" Toshiya frowned and crossed his arms, wondering if that's the reason for Die's sudden avoidance.

"Yeah, Satoshi and Hiroto saw those fags going into the toilets together." The lighter haired teen blanched even further, feeling as if his stomach was about to turn inside out.

"So? That's a dumb reason to call someone a fag. We all go to the toilets together." Toshiya mocked, the boy shook his head.

"Why'd they lock the door then? Not to mention they were in there for a long time and it was after school!" The boy accused, as if the two other boys he was talking about weren't even in the room.

"Toshiya stop defending the fags!" Another student joined in.

"Maybe he's one of them," Toshiya's face fell and he was quickly turning pale.

"So what?" Kyo finally spoke up, his voice steady and bored in spite of their accusations.

"Huh?" The main accuser blurted out, taken aback by Kyo's nonchalance.

"So what if I'm a homo? That doesn't mean I can't beat your ass black and blue." He challenged.

"Besides, are you guys sure you aren't gay? Since you care so fucking much about other guys going to the toilet." Toshiya seemed to gain back his confidence from Kyo, Shinya for his part looked like he was on the verge of a panic attack.

"What were Satoshi and Hiroto doing after school anyway?" The dark haired boy snorted.

"On a Saturday," Kyo added with a smirk.

"And watching other guys go into the bathroom too," he shook his head and laughed, but his hands were grasping the desk with white knuckles.

The other boys looked like they wanted to argue still, but the teacher came back into the classroom and Die wasn't too far behind. The conflicting boys glared at each other until their attention was demanded from their teacher. Die looked between his friend and the other boys with silent resignation, seemingly having an idea of what transpired in his absence.


	18. Heart to Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toshiya and Die sort out their differences.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I love you all so much!

"I'm seriously going to kick his ass." Toshiya barked once class was over and everyone was packing up their things. Die had snuck out earlier than usual without a glance to any of his friends.

Toshiya was understandably pissed off by this, as Shinya was a little miffed as well.

"Toshiya don't bother," Shinya murmured falling into step with Toshiya and Kyo as they left the classroom.

"No way, I need to know if he's avoiding us because of that dumb rumor." The lighter haired teen remained quiet, knowing now that this was more for Toshiya to at least have a fighting chance of saving his friendship than anything else.

"And if he is?" Kyo asked, even though he had an air of unconcern Shinya could tell just by the stiffness of his body that the shorter teenager was bothered by Die's behavior as well.

"I'm going to make him see reason." A determination Shinya had never seen before took over his friend's face.

"I can come with you..." Shinya offered quietly, Toshiya shook his head.

"I need to talk to him about other things to...But if anything goes wrong, do you mind if I come over?" The vulnerability in his voice made Shinya's heart ache but minutely envious at the same time. He admired how easily his taller friend wore his heart on his sleeve and wasn't afraid of his own emotions. It still made him sorrowful to hear how desperate Toshiya seemed to be to get his best friend back, even though he hid it under a guise of anger.

He was hurt and Shinya couldn't blame him.

"Yeah, come over any time." Shinya looked over at the shorter teenager to make sure he understood this as well.

"Okay," Toshiya sighed, "wish me luck."

~

Toshiya had said his goodbyes to Shinya and Kyo, soon finding his way to Die's door without thinking about it. This path had been ingrained into his head since elementary school due to the times he would come over and have play dates with his best friend.

Sighing, he knocked on the door and put on his bravest face.

"Hello? Oh! Toshimasa! It's been so long since I've seen you!" Daisuke's mother opened the door and was surprised to see her son's best friend. Toshiya offered her a small smile, feeling heavy due to the fact that his presence at the Andou household had become a scarcity.

"Nice to see you Andou-san. Is Daisuke-kun here?" He asked politely, finding himself missing Die's mother as well as his best friend.

"Yes, he's upstairs. Please come in, the neighbor just brought us some Dorayaki! You should try it!" She ushered him and waited patiently for Toshiya to take off his sneakers.

"Thank you Andou-san, though I'll be just a minute." Her face fell but she nodded anyway.

"I'll wrap some up for you so that you can take it to your mother. Is she well?" Toshiya nodded, the heaviness feeling even more oppressive somehow.

"She's well thank you. Her medicine is working well for her." Mrs. Andou smiled at guided the teenager to the stairs, as if Toshiya had forgotten since his last visit.

"Good to hear." She said softly and puttered back into the kitchen, presumably to wrap the Dorayaki. Toshiya swallowed and took the stairs one step at a time, instead of the usual two to three he use to do when he and Die raced up to the former red head's room.

Once at Die's bedroom door, he exhaled and entertained the thought of knocking before deciding to just barge in.

"Huh? Mom, I said I was bus-" Die started off, turning to the door with an irritated face that turned to wide eyed nervousness when he saw who it really was.

"My name's not mom." Toshiya replied, trying to lighten the mood with a joke but failed.

"Toshimasa." Die said simply, looking at a loss for words.

"Got it right that time," He said nervously.

"What are you doing here?" Die asked point blank, putting down the book he was reading and sitting up on his bed.

"To talk." The taller by an inch teenager shut the door, sure that Die's sisters were probably home and able to eavesdrop.

"What do we need to talk about?" The owner of the room tried to play it off, as if he wasn't avoiding his three friends.

"I know that you're avoiding us and I know we're still not okay from before." Toshiya blurted out, wanting to get rid of his heavy heart.

"I'm not avoi-"

"Cut the crap, I know you are and I know the reason why." Die bit his lip and crossed his arms.

"Then what is it?" He narrowed his eyes at his friend.

"You don't want to be associated with a bunch of gays, right? Looks bad for your image, huh? Even though you have a girlfriend." Toshiya spat, the word 'girlfriend' coming out far more venomous than what he had intended. Nevertheless, Daisuke physically flinched at this.

"That's not it!" Daisuke huffed, his eyes searching the wall behind his friend for some kind of better comeback.

"Then what is it?!" The other finally exploded, his voice wavering in desperation, wanting so badly to know why his friend had abandoned them so easily.

"I'm sorry I was mad at you and being stupid about your girlfriend! I tried to be okay with it and I am! But you don't understand how badly it hurts to just be left by your best friend!" Die looked down, a feeling of guilt overwhelming him once again.

"I'm sorry! Is that what you want to hear? Do you want me to apologize every single day of my life? Is that what it takes to get my best friend back?" Toshiya was on the verge of tears.

"Just tell me and I'll fix it." Daisuke couldn't take the broken tone of his once cheerful best friend.

"It is that." Die replied almost inaudibly, his own tone of voice small and self-loathing.

"We're your friends and you dropped us over some dumb rumor?" The betrayal and heartbreak in his voice and face made Die stand up and cross over to his friend and envelop him into a surprise hug.

"Look, I was scared okay?" Die murmured, his face burning crimson. Toshiya pushed Die so that he was at arms length.

"Scared of what? Being called gay?" Die nodded fervently.

"Because I am." He admitted, screwing his eyes shut and expecting a punch, name-calling, something that would prove his fears of rejection were true.

Instead, he was bewildered to hear Toshiya laugh.

"Huh?" He opened his eyes, confused and alarmed to see Toshiya doubled up with laughter but his eyes streaming with tears.

"Die, you fucking moron." Toshiya laughed harder.

"What? Why are you laughing?" He asked, becoming defensive.

"You went through the trouble to get a girlfriend, hang out with her, and avoided us because you're afraid of being called gay even though you are." He summarized, Die nodded slowly. His face burned hotter at the realization that he almost lost his best friend over something silly. Still, his fear was legitimate.

"You even told me I needed to get my dick sucked." Daisuke nodded again, feeling the onslaught of guilt all over again from that episode.

"You fucking made me cry you asshole." Toshiya groaned but ended up chuckling once again.

"Yeah and I'm sorry for that. In my defense though, I really thought you were jealous I got a girlfriend before you." The former red head put his hands up in defense.

"I get it," Toshiya assured, "but why bother getting a girlfriend anyway?"

"My parents were bothering me about it...and I didn't want to admit it to myself. I thought that if I got a girlfriend then these weird feelings would go away, you know?" Die tried to explain, his friend just snorted.

"Can't say that I do, but I get it. You're dad's pretty well..." He started off.

"Yeah, traditional." Daisuke finished for him.

"But avoiding us? What was up with that?" The taller of the two boys asked, his arms crossed against his chest.

"Well, it just made sense at the time." The awkwardness clung to Daisuke as he too folded his arms against his chest, looking off to the side and wondering what to say next.

"Honestly, I don't know whether to punch the hell out of you or kiss you. You fucking idiot." Die did a double take, his eyes going wide and his mouth opening and closing without saying a word.

"Um, what?" Toshiya grinned down at him and sighed.

"You almost ruined a nine year friendship because you were afraid of some gay thoughts about me. I don't know if I should be flattered or pissed." It was Die's turn to laugh.

"How do you know it's you? Maybe I wanna get in Shinya's pants?" Die immediately regretted saying this as Toshiya visibly deflated.

"Really?" He sounded so dejected that Die was washed over in a feeling of self-loathing.

"No, it's really you. My lame attempt at a joke." He said weakly.

"Yeah, I'm definitely going to punch you." The taller teen laughed, wiping at his eyes with a meek smile.

"If you're still offering a kiss, I'll gladly take that." Die laughed, leaning upwards and pecking a blushing Toshiya on the lips chastely.

"I wanted my first kiss to be more romantic," he chuckled while trying to fight down the growing blush dusting his cheeks.

"What? You crying your eyes out in my room after yelling at me isn't romantic?" Die said sarcastically.

"Shut up and kiss me again, you asshole."


	19. Confrontation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While Shinya is happy for his best friends, he and Kyo are confronted about the rumors.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!

Worry enveloped Shinya as he sat at the kitchen table, trying hard to focus on his homework but finding it nearly impossible. He hoped that Toshiya would be alright and that his two friends would be able to make amends somehow.

"Your friends are here," his father poked his head in through the door and was gone before his son could say anything.

"Friends?" Shinya repeated, confused. He got up from the table and wandered into the hallway where Toshiya was grinning toothily at him alongside a shy looking Die.

"Everything went well?" The lighter haired boy asked, feeling his face break into a smile.

"You could say that." Toshiya said, reaching out and interlocking his fingers with Die's.

Shinya looked at both of them in confusion before it finally sunk in.

"Congrats!" He exclaimed excitedly and hugged both of his friends.

"Thanks." Die said awkwardly, his face flushed but not unhappy at all. In fact, a small grin was spreading across his red face.

"Now we can go on double dates!" Toshiya teased lowly.

"Huh? Shinya's dating someone?!" Die's head swiveled to his boyfriend and then to Shinya, his voice overtaking a protective tone.

"Not yet," His boyfriend smirked.

"What? Who is it?" Shinya just shrugged sheepishly.

"He's so out of the loop, isn't it cute?" Toshiya pinched his new boyfriend's cheek obnoxiously, laughing when Die pawed his hand away.

"It really is nothing, Die." Shinya assured, he couldn't help but chuckle when the former red head sent him a crooked smile.

"No one tells me anything anymore," he faux complained, but patted Shinya's shoulder anyway.

"There's a reason for that Die-die." Toshiya remarked and guided his boyfriend back to the door.

"We'll talk more tomorrow, alright? Die has to walk me home." The taller teenager said and waved goodbye before exiting the Terachi residence.

Shinya nodded and watched them go, his brain happy for them but his heart was aching with jealousy.

However, deep down he felt a glimmer of hope blooming within his chest.

Maybe there was hope for him and Kyo.

~

In spite of Shinya's jealousy, he was extremely happy to note that everything was pretty much back to normal. Die and Toshiya were back to joyfully teasing each other, sharing lunch, and having each others' backs.

The lighter haired teen could also tell that Kyo was completely at ease with this development. His head was currently nestled between his arms as he slept peacefully, his assignment waded up and stuffed into his pocket.

In addition to their current peace, the rumors that had been troubling the group of friends were dying down or at the very least, Shinya was getting better at ignoring the constant stares and none to subtle whispers.

"Terachi Shinya and Nakamura Kyo," a man called out from the classroom sliding door. Shinya cocked his head in confusion, as he recognized the man from the school's main office.

"Here," Shinya said as he jostled Kyo to wakefulness and beckoned the shorter student to follow him.

"Your parents are waiting for you in the Principal's office." The man said tightly. Both teens looked at each other with a shrug, although Shinya looked far more apprehensive than Kyo did.

They followed the older office worker to the Principal's office silently, both thinking about what they may have done to warrant an audience with him and their parents.

Shinya racked his brain, but it all became clear when he saw the odd expression his father was sporting. It was a mixture of anger and disbelief, which hardened into a furious scowl when his father saw him.

Kyo simply followed Shinya into the small office and stood by the taller teen without paying much attention to a severe looking woman who was standing next to the Principal.

"Kyo, come here." She pointed a talon-like finger at her son and pointed to the chair in front of the old principal's desk.

"I'm fine right here." Kyo said with a poker-face, his tone nonchalant.

"Shinya, sit down." Despite every nerve in his body screaming at him to listen, the younger Terachi gulped and shook his head.

"I prefer to stand." He clenched out, the palms of his hands sweating with anxiety.

"It doesn't matter," the elder principal sighed and sat in his own chair.

"Why are we here?" Kyo asked, crossing his arms against his chest and glancing between the three adults in the room.

"I was notified by many students and faculty members about a potential rumor concerning the two of you." The Principal said cryptically. Kyo rolled his eyes, Shinya could see he was enjoying playing up the delinquent image everyone had of him. Whether it was because of his mother or if this was just the image he portrayed in front of all adults, remained to be seen by the younger Terachi.

"The one where I'm a demon and Shinya's secretly a girl?" The short teen mocked. Out of the corner of Shinya's eye, he could see Kyo's mother quickly turning to an alarming shade of red and he could swear that a couple of black hairs were falling out of her tightly tied bun from rage.

"Quit playing around, boy!" Shinya's father barked, his own face blossoming to an annoyed pink.

"The one in which the two of you were spotted going into a locked bathroom together for an unbefitting amount of time for two boys." The Principal said coolly, unperturbed by his student's antics.

"What, that?" Kyo said, his eyes searching around the room for a witty comeback.

"Yes, that. I was notified by the staff that you two have an unusually close friendship and with the pervasiveness of the rumor, I thought it would be prudent to notify your parents about your alleged activities." The old man explained, flashing a knowing smirk between the boys.

"We're best friends." Shinya blurted out, glancing between his father and the principal pleadingly.

"Yeah, we're best friends. We like the same manga." Kyo reiterated.

"And the bathroom?" The Principal prompted.

"I shit my pants." Kyo announced proudly while Shinya cringed inwardly.

"Nakamura Kyo!" His mother gasped at the vulgarity while Mr. Terachi and the Principal simply shook their heads.

"Shinya was keeping a lookout while I cleaned my pants." The shorter teen explained, very much looking like the cat who caught the canary.

"Alright..." The older man said, not really knowing what else to say.

"I can bring evidence if you aren't completely convinced," Kyo said with a feral grin and Shinya had to force himself to keep his laughter inside as their principal shook his head again.

"That won't be necessary. Honestly, there's nothing I can really do about this, so I'm turning the both of you over to your parents today. They will punish the both of you as they see fit." Shinya gulped and peered at Kyo who's expression was stony.

"Sir, please. We really didn't do anything wrong-!" The taller teen began but was harshly cut off by Kyo's mother.

"Quiet child! Perhaps if you groomed yourself properly, the other students wouldn't think of you as a girl!" She snapped, successfully cowing Shinya but igniting the anger within her own son.

"Don't fucking talk to him like that." Kyo growled, his body going tense and very much looking like he was about to pounce on his own mother.

"Alright, calm down." The principal stood up and ushered the two teens and their parents out of his office and shut his door, seemingly relieved to have Kyo out of his hair.

"Let's go Shinya." After Kyo's outburst, Shinya dared not to disobey his father. He shot a sorrowful look to Kyo who offered him a small smile in return.


	20. Trust

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're getting closer to the end of this particle part in the story. I kinda didn't realize how long this was going to be! Something that was supposed to be like 15 chapters or less is getting kinda out of hand. Like, this is just the first part of their story and after looking at my initial plan for this story, to completely write what I wanted it's gonna be at least another part (or as I had messily scrawled on my Government notebook, a .5 and then a whole other part if that makes sense). Tbh, I don't even think this is interesting enough but eyyy why not?
> 
> Honestly, I already wrote the last chapter for this whole entire story and that's what I'm looking forward to haha.
> 
> As always, please enjoy!

The walk back home was silent, as his father was still obviously livid and Shinya was far too nervous to speak.

When the father and son walked into the home, Shinya's father ordered his son to sit at the table and not to move until he came back.

Every fiber of Shinya's being was screaming at him to run, but he dutifully followed his father's orders and sat at the table, every finger and toe fidgeting in anxiety.

He could have sworn his father was gone for an eternity, until he could hear the heavy steps of the older man coming down the staircase.

"Look straight and don't move your head." He father commanded and brandished a pair of metal scissors, Shinya turned pale once again and shook his head.

"Please don't," he whimpered, squirming around in the chair but quickly became still when his father grabbed a handful of his hair painfully and began cutting indiscriminately.

Shinya watched in horror as lock after lock of hair fluttered down onto the floor in a growing pile. He slapped his hands onto his eyes, trying to shut out everything that was going on, but the 'snip' of the scissors prevented him from completely disassociating.

Finally, after most of the floor beneath him was covered in his hair, his father pulled away and murmured for him to go upstairs and not come down until school the next day. Shinya scrambled out of the chair like a cat who had been unwittingly dumped into a tub of water, he ran upstairs and avoided glancing at every reflective surface.

Once in his room, he locked the door and buried his head in his pillow, tearfully wishing he didn't exist anymore.

~

"What's with the baseball cap?" Toshiya asked curiously as they walked to school the next morning, Shinya remained silent and merely adjusted the hat selfconsciously.

"It's nothing." He mumbled as a reply, pawing Toshiya's prying hands away from his head.

"Come on, did you get a bad haircut?" The taller boy asked jokingly, flipping the brim of the hat over Shinya's head and revealing the shorter student's mangled hair.

The ends of his hair were uneven and clipped down all the way to his neck, granted the humiliated student was thankful that his father had left the hair hanging over his ears alone for the most part, despite being differing lengths than the rest of his hair.

"Who did this?" Toshiya asked, his voice hard and his eyes flaring with sudden anger as Shinya scrambled for his hat.

"Just leave it alone," The embarrassed student muttered and started to walk faster, Toshiya began to jog just to keep up with his friend.

"Who? I'll kick their teeth in." He threatened, the other boy just shook his head.

"My dad, now can we just walk in peace?" Toshiya bit his lip but nodded, opting to silently seethe while Shinya felt dread wash over him as they got closer to school.

"Morning guys," Die greeted, smiling at his boyfriend and best friend. He fell into step with the two friends but made sure to keep his distance from his boyfriend, being extremely weary as to not arouse suspicion.

"Thanks for waiting, asshole." Toshiya bit out, despite the barbed words there was a bright smile on his lips.

"Anything for you, sweetie." Die grinned, making sure to whisper the last part. Toshiya rolled his eyes and joked around with Die for the rest of their trek to school, but linked his arm with Shinya in an effort to be a reassuring presence.

"You look fine Shinya, don't worry about it." Toshiya whispered and patted his hand. Shinya grimaced but nodded and took in a deep breath before entering the building.

Thankfully, he was able to keep a low profile in the hallways while hiding behind his taller friend and slipped into the classroom without anyone pointing out his mangled hair.

Everyone except for Kyo it seemed.

Kyo looked up to greet his friend, but instead he did a double take and opened his mouth to say something but promptly closed it after a long moment.

Shinya burned red, extremely embarrassed, and buried his head into his arms and stayed that way until lunch time while Toshiya viciously fended off any of the others boys who dared to try and take Shinya's hat off.

"Shinya, do you wanna share lunches?" Toshiya prodded him and offered the depressed teen half of his steam bun, Shinya just shook his head.

"I can fix it for you," his friend offered hopefully, putting aside his steamed bun and taking out a pair of scissors from his bag.

"It's okay!" Shinya's head shot up and he pressed the hat securely down on his head, Toshiya pouted but put the scissors down.

"What? You don't trust me?!" Die laughed and took the scissors away from his friend.

"Can you blame him though? I remember you cut your bangs all the way to your forehead and they were still uneven!" Toshiya gasped and kicked his boyfriend's chair playfully, only slightly nudging it away from him.

"That was the style back then!" He protested, making Die laugh and Shinya crack a smile.

"I can do it for you, Shinya." Kyo said quietly, startling the taller student.

"Okay." Shinya agreed immediately, knowing that Kyo wouldn't volunteer if he wasn't able to at least make it a little better.

"You don't trust me, but you trust him?!" Toshiya cried out, looking scandalized. Shinya merely shrugged with a small smile and took his hat off while Kyo sat on the desk behind him.

"Good luck," Die said and handed over the scissors to Kyo.

Immediately Kyo began snipping away at the hair at the back of his head, carefully carding his hand through Shinya's mangled tresses, his nimble fingers acting as a comb.

"Okay, the back is even now. I'm going to do the front." Kyo announced, sliding off of the desk and moving around to Shinya's side. His hand came up to the taller boy's cheek and nudged his face to the side so Shinya was looking straight at Kyo. His face was rigid in concentration, the tip of his tongue peeking out from his lips as he gently brushed Shinya's bangs this way and that.

Their eyes met for just a brief moment and Shinya was taken aback by the kind look in Kyo's eyes. Clear and alert, while his eyes were usually lidded in boredom. A small upturn of Kyo's lips made Shinya smile back at him, not bothering to veil the look of adoration he normally kept hidden.

Kyo cleared his throat and began clipping again, his hand drifting downward every once in a while to cup Shinya's soft cheek.

Both teens were completely unaware of both Toshiya and Die watching them with matching grins until Shinya glanced at his friend through the corner of his eye and blushed darkly when both boys sent him a thumbs up.

"I think I'm done. Toshiya, do you have a pocket mirror?" Kyo asked, carefully taking the mirror from Toshiya while Die snickered and teased his boyfriend about being vain. Kyo handed the mirror over to Shinya, his poker face firmly in place once again.

Shinya accepted the mirror nervously and glanced at it, immediately surprised to see his new haircut.

Kyo had not only evened it out, which left the length clipped down to his neck, but he had cut Shinya's bangs to the point where they barely brushed his forehead. It didn't look bad though, and Shinya could tell that both Die and Toshiya were impressed with Kyo's handiwork.

"Where'd ya learn how to cut hair?" Die asked, observing Kyo's work appreciatively.

"My parents would just shave my head, so I learned how to cut my own hair." Kyo shrugged as if it wasn't a big deal.

"I love it, thank you Kyo." Shinya smiled up at him after inspecting his hair from all angles via the mirror.

Kyo cleared his throat and averted his eyes to the floor, looking embarrassed but a tiny grin was clearly on display.

"I'm returning the favor." Shinya chuckled and fell even harder.


	21. A Moonlight Confession

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The beginnings of a star-crossed relationship blooms between Kyo and Shinya.
> 
> Maybe Shinya has finally found his happy ending?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAHHH

The four teenagers walked home after school per usual, happily chatting with each other about the impending summer vacation and what they were going to do. After Toshiya had laid out his plan to visit his family in Nagano for a couple of days, Die had announced that they were going to the beach and camping out and the three other teens agreed immediately. Even Kyo passively nodded to the idea of a beach day.

"What about you, Shinya?" Die asked as they passed the school gate.

"Probably visiting my mom in Hirakata." He shrugged, his mind wandering elsewhere.

"Make sure to tell me when you're going so we can schedule our trip around it." Die said, ruffling his friend's hair fondly.

"Shinya, can I talk to you?" Kyo asked suddenly, tugging the taller teen's backpack strap gently. The two boyfriends shared knowing smirks and promptly said their goodbye and hurried away; Toshiya giggling and Die grinning wide.

"Can I come over later tonight?" Shinya nodded, somehow already knowing that Kyo was going to ask him that question.

"Yeah, like last time?" Kyo kicked a pebble, his fingers fidgeted which Shinya found was out of character for him.

"Yeah, well I'll see ya then." Shinya waved to him as Kyo went the opposite direction.

After standing on the sidewalk for several more minutes with a big smile on his face, Shinya rushed home and hurriedly raided the fridge before running up the stairs to avoid his father as they were still not speaking to each other.

After spending hours trying to do his homework and eating his cold dinner, he finally pushed everything to the side and threw himself onto the bed. He was half waiting for Kyo and half wanting to clear his racing mind, his efforts to calm himself down didn't fail as he quickly succumbed to a dreamless sleep.

Like the other night when Kyo visited, Shinya was awakened by the sound of something tapping his window. He blearily rubbed his eyes and once he remembered what Kyo had said, the teenager rushed to the window and opened it.

Kyo tumbled in with a plastic bag filled with snacks his tattered backpack.

"Glad you're still up." Kyo remarked after toeing his shoes off and sitting on the bed with Shinya who wrapped the blanket around him.

"I almost didn't wake up," Shinya chuckled and helped himself to the bag of chips Kyo quietly opened and sat between them. After popping a couple of chips into his mouth, he started to play with a flashlight Kyo had stored in his backpack.

"I'm glad you did, it was starting to get cold." The shorter teenager leaned up to ruffle his friend's hair, his fingers lingering far longer than Shinya expected. Shinya stopped making shadow puppets against the wall and positioned the flashlight on his lap facing up so it illuminated the whole room.

"You know, I like you even if your hair is short." Shinya blushed and pushed Kyo's fingers away, instead opting to interlink his fingers with Kyo's. His heart raced as Kyo simply flexed his finger's against Shinya's but didn't pull away.

"Thank you, you're a really great friend to me." Kyo grinned crookedly and shook his head.

"I don't like you like that," the dark-haired teenager laughed, shaking his head which made Shinya worry.

"What do you mean? You don't like me as a friend?" Kyo reached up with his free hand and pressed the worried crease between Shinya's eyebrows down.

"I like you like this." He removed his hand from his taller friend's face and pulled the blanket that was draped against his shoulders over both his and Shinya's heads. Their faces were illuminated by the flashlight still on the younger student's lap, he could see the vulnerable and nervous look on Kyo's face as the older student leaned forward and gently pressed his lips against Shinya's.

Shinya's eyes were wide with shock, completely unaware that Kyo shared the same feelings. All too soon, Kyo leaned back and bit his lip, seemingly taking Shinya's shock as rejection.

"I'm sorry." Kyo hung his head and moved to take the blanket off of them but was stopped by Shinya interlocking their hands again and kissing him first on the nose then gingerly on the lips.

"I like you too." He whispered after he pulled away, nuzzling his face against Kyo's neck.

"I liked you ever since that day you saved me." The word 'like' felt bitter on his tongue. It was a complete understatement for how he felt about the older student pressed up against him, but he thought that if he slipped and said 'love' it would scare Kyo away.

"You saved me too." Kyo murmured, running a hand through Shinya's short hair.

"Are you sure you're okay with this?" Shinya gestured between them, a frown starting to grow on his face as he remembered how cruel Kyo's family could be. The taller student didn't care if he never spoke to his father again if it meant that he could be with Kyo for as long as he lived, but he knew that Kyo's family were far more willing to hurt the shorter student.

"I don't care. I'm so used to being stared at and disliked, at least it'll be worth it if you're standing beside me." Those words that came forth so easily from Kyo's mouth moved Shinya to tears. He threw his arms around Kyo and kissed him hard, the older student's hands came up and cupped Shinya's face gently with his thumbs rubbing loving circles into the younger student's cheeks.

"I know this sounds stupid, but I wish I could stay here with you, like this, until I die." Kyo smiled and kissed his lips sweetly before Shinya pressed against him harder, wanting more of those dangerous kisses.

"Me too. I didn't think someone would ever like me back." Kyo chuckled after both boys pulled away for air and laid against each other comfortably.

"Shut up, you're amazing." Shinya sighed tiredly, snuggling against Kyo.

"You're the only one who thinks so." Kyo remarked and glanced at Shinya when he didn't hear a response. The other boy was sleeping soundly, his lips set into a genuine smile and his face was peaceful.

Smiling lightly to himself, Kyo leaned towards him and pecked the taller boy's lips. He settled beside Shinya and idly traced the outline of his plush lips with gentle fingers, he wistfully wondered if they could stay this close for as long as they lived. Afterall, they weren't promised forever.

XxX

  
"Good morning." Shinya blearily blinked his eyes open and was momentarily shocked to see Kyo's sleepy eyes looking straight back at him, a small grin was on his face which confused the taller teenager.

"...Kyo?" He murmured, rubbing at his eyes and sitting up.

"Did you sleep well?" Kyo asked while nuzzling against the younger teen, his hands splayed over Shinya's chest.

"Um yeah..." Shinya answered, his eyes tracing imaginary lines on the ceiling until he remembered last night with a jolt.

"We kissed, oh my god, we kissed last night!" He cried out, a look of wild uncertainty marred his once peaceful face.

"We did more than kiss." Kyo teased which made Shinya bury his head into the pillow both he and Kyo shared.

"No way! My ass doesn't hurt!" He punched Kyo's shoulder weakly and bured his head into the pillow once again.

"I'm just kidding. I'm sure your dad would come in and kill me if I even thought about it." Kyo snickered and leaned down to kiss Shinya's head.

Both boys lapsed into a comfortable silence; Kyo holding Shinya and pressing kisses to his hair while Shinya contemplated everything that had happened last night. Overall, he was extremely happy to know that Kyo liked him the same way he liked the shorter student. Yet, were they really a couple? Was it something they fell into after kissing each other and affirming their attraction to one another? Did he have to ask Kyo to become his boyfriend? It confused him so much, he wished he could just ask Toshiya and Die.

Finally, it was Shinya who broke the silence. His racing thoughts were far too loud to just keep within himself.

"So, what does this make us?" He asked hesitantly, afraid that Kyo didn't want the relationship aspect of their attraction.

"Definitely not just friends, that's for sure." Kyo snorted, carding a hand through Shinya's short hair.

"Not just friends," Shinya repeated, unsure of how to take this.

"This is something new for me, I hope you understand...So I want to explore this new thing with you. You know, if you want me." It was Kyo's turn to be nervous as Shinya hummed with blank face before he broke out in a shimmering smile.

"Yeah, I've never had a boyfriend before. So, it's new to the both of us." Kyo leaned forward and kissed the top of his new boyfriend's head.

"I'm kinda...Nervous? I guess. I've never had a girlfriend before either." The shorter student shrugged, Shinya brought up both of his hands and cupped Kyo's face, momentarily disbelieving that this was Kyo. This was really Kyo in his bed, having this conversation with him. It gave Shinya goosebumps just even thinking about it.

"Me too, but it'll be alright." The taller student assured.

"I know," Kyo said with an air of confidence, but his fingers twitching on Shinya's shoulder betrayed his inner feelings. Shinya remained quiet though, intent on enjoying the comforting glow that was blooming between them.


End file.
